“He seems like a great guy, but I can’t get over my trust issues”

I have a rather complicated story, but I really need some advice, so please bear with me! I met a guy about three weeks ago on a dating app, and on the first date, he established that he was looking for a serious relationship, and not just a hookup. Since then, we’ve been seeing each other and speaking quite a lot over the phone (which is very unusual for me).

We share a lot of common interests, and so far he has been a very nice guy. A few days ago, he asked me if I wanted to go exclusive with him, and in the spur of the moment I said yes. Now I’m beginning to wonder if it was the right thing to do. I know it is unfair for me to judge him based on my past relationships (I was cheated on by my now ex-fiancĂ©, and I was abused for many years by a male relative in my childhood).

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“Is my wife flirting with a bodybuilder?”

My spouse has been working out tremendously over the last 6 months. She looks great, feels great. Great! So today she is on Facebook and notices that one of the bodybuilders she has been following, and had done routines that he designed, is in our city at another gym. She posts to his Facebook to “come to Anytime Fitness tomorrow at 7:00 am to work out” with heart emojis at the end. WTF. Then she gets mad at me for getting upset!

“My boyfriend is super-sneaky with his phone”

My boyfriend practices very sneaky behavior:

  1. He deletes all text conversations, including mine, upon ending them. Remaining text logs include his mom, dad and sister. He says it’s a habit.
  2. He rejects incoming calls but will immediately respond to incoming text messages. Tells me it’s because our time together is valuable.
  3. If he does happen to answer an incoming call from an unsaved phone number he immediately & discreetly lowers the receiver volume. He had no excuse for that one. Said he won’t do it again.

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“My wife caught me snooping through her phone, but I have a legitimate reason to do so”

I need some advice. The last time my wife changed the password on her phone, I found out she was talking to one of her exes, and she tried hooking up with him. It was quickly foiled when I confronted her about it, and the issue was resolved. She hasn’t spoken to him since. HOWEVER, I recently noticed she changed her password again.

I got caught trying to snoop, and she FLIPPED OUT. She threatened to divorce me and kick me out of the house. My question is, was I justified in thinking something wasn’t right and checking up on her?

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“My boyfriend hasn’t cheated, but I can’t stop checking his phone”

I have been with my boyfriend for three-and-a-half years now. He is beyond perfect for me. He’s always there, he’s so romantic, and I know he loves me. I’m his first girlfriend.

I have been cheated on and hurt in the past, and I still have my guard up, but my boyfriend doesn’t even show interest in other girls, and always makes me feel special and tells me how pretty I am, and it does make me feel amazing. But whenever I see him talk to someone else or add someone on Facebook, I get extremely jealous, and it always turns into an argument!

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“Can I forgive him, or should I leave?”

I’ve been with my boyfriend 15 months, living together for 6. I’m 27.

Up until a week ago, my life revolved around this man. I never believed in soulmates or anything, but he was my best friend. He made me feel like it could be true. I trusted him with my life.

About a week ago, I was talking to a friend about a girl my boyfriend used to live with. My boyfriend had told me this girl was obsessed with him, that she had kissed him on the cheek once, but that was it. Nothing else had ever happened.

I had a niggling feeling, and I remember asking him a few times about this girl. Each time he got cross and told me I had to trust him.

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“Lied early on in the relationship, now he can’t trust me, advice needed”

I’m 18, female, and have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year now.

At the start of our relationship I lied about being with other people, exaggerating my sexual past, so I wouldn’t seem like such an inexperienced girl. I didn’t think much of it at the time, it was very early on.

However, he has been completely honest about his sexual past and I have betrayed his trust by lying about mine. I love him so much that I didn’t want to lose him, the more time that passed, the worse it got, eventually I had to come out with the truth, that he was the only man I’d ever properly been with.

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“Learning to trust again”

Me and my partner were together for 6 years, we always drank a lot socially and he did drugs before we got together and very rarely when we were together as I really don’t agree with drugs.

Anyway we had a daughter and I hardly drink at all now but he started drinking more and more and did drugs at our home one night when I was out with friends (our daughter was with her grandparents) I left him over this as it was the last straw for me, we split up for over 6months and he’s drinking and drug habit was a bit out of control but he didn’t drink when he had our daughter. We decided to give things another go a few months ago and things have been OK, he rarely drinks now but I am finding it so hard to trust him and keep wondering if we’re only together for the sake of our daughter although we get on well etc.

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“Untrusted Still”

I’m really tired of not being able to talk to my SO about what’s bothering me in our relationship.

I’m not trusted. Despite being told that I am, I’m constantly under suspicion of doing something wrong. It’s evident by my SO looking thru my emails and stuff, facebook, and facebook searching my exes to see if there’s some connection still. I volunteer the phone and password and stuff because I’ve done nothing wrong. It hurts every time and makes me uneasy

I didn’t do anything inappropriate with my ex, I haven’t been in the same room as this person in over ten years. After my grandfather died, they expressed their condolences and asked to meet up for a cup of coffee and catch up next time they were in town. This set my SO off so much that I had to remove this other person from my fb altogether. There is no other contact with them. All of this was two years ago.

Two years later I still get accused of being out suspiciously late, get my stuff checked and have seen my SO searching/spying on my ex.

I’m not sure how clear this is, but I don’t really care that much about the ex, it’s more the actions of my SO. It hurts and the couple of times I’ve brought it up it makes it look like I’m pining for an old lover.

Is there a way to talk about it without it having anything to do with the ex at all? Do I just accept that this is the way it’ll be?

Who the hell do I talk to about this and please don’t say counseling, ive not the time nor money.

How to rebuild her trust?

I have been in a relationship with a girl for about 6 months. Everything has been great between us, but she has had many personal problems that she has had to deal with during that time. Mostly related to money.

We work at the same place, but different departments. I make much more than she does, and I have offered to help her many times because she means alot to me, but she has always turned down my help bease she didn’t want to be a pRobles for me.

A few weeks ago she told me about alot of new problems that came up, and I was worried about her, and if she was going to be ok. She made it sound like there was no way out of a bad situation. Eventually she didn’t want to talk to me about it anymore because she didn’t want to be a burden on me, and I just wanted to help in any way I could.

I was so worried, and felt like I had to do something, and I made the mistake of saying something to her manager about it. At the time it seemed like a good idea, because I know she really respected him and has confided in him about a lot of personal things in the past, but she saw it as me breaking her trust in something she told me in confidence. I’ve tried to appoligize, but she doesn’t want to talk to me about it. I know I did something stupid, but I wasn’t thinking clearly. All I did was worry constantly about what would happen to her and her kids, and in the fog of it all I had horrible judgment, and made a stupid choice despite my good intentions. Is there anything I can do to rebuild her trust in me? Even if she doesn’t want to be in a relationship, I really just want her to know that I never meant to hurt her, but I was just going crazy with worry, and I wasn’t thinking clearly, so I made a bad decision.