“Where do I fit in the picture?”

Family of 4, hubby quit his job 5 years ago to go to school. I have been supporting him emotionally and financially through that time. For 4 years we would talk about our dreams after he graduates, which has helped me get through this long journey.

But the past 6 months he’s been so busy, we haven’t been talking as much. I asked him about jobs he is applying for, and he informs me that all our plans we have been discussing are no longer an option  – and he is applying for jobs in places we have never talked about! I’m hurt, these were our dreams as a family, not just his dreams, so where do I fit in the picture?

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“My husband is always on vacation with his dad”

I really need advice on my 5 year marriage. We are 29 and 31 and recently my husband has been going on vacation with his father for two weeks every year on the other side of the world. Recently, when my husband came back from vacation, literally the day after, he tells me that he is now planning on going on another vacation with his dad in Mexico very soon.

We have never gone on vacation together even though I have asked him on many occasions. It just seems unfair to me that he has just come back, we are in the middle of closing on a new house and I guess I’m angry because he makes no effort to plan any adventures or vacations of any kind with me. Yet when his dad pays for him to go with him somewhere, he jumps at the chance with no thought at all to invite me too.

His dad remarried a few years ago and has a bad marriage with his current wife, and he always seems to spend a lot of time away from her. I am worried that he is staring to influence my husband to do the same thing. As far as I am aware we have a loving marriage, I just get frustrated why my husband can’t understand that it upsets me and I feel excluded from his life. I know that if my parents invited me on vacation they would make sure my husband was invited too as we are married and to be honest I feel that marriage should include experiencing new things and places with each other. Am I wrong?

“My husband invites his parents when we go out”

Any time I ask my husband to go somewhere or do something we plan it out, but then he “uses the bathroom” and calls his mom and invites her and his dad along. It ends up that I don’t go. I do not want to spend time with them,  I want to spend time with my husband.

We went out to eat on Saturday night and I wanted pozole but he invited his mom and we went somewhere else. It just really bothers me.

“To move or not to move?”

My husband and I are having a very hard time making a decision. We need to decide within a month or two if we should move to Vegas or stay in San Diego. He is in the Navy and I’m a stay at home mom, we have two kids, 2 and 5.

He is about to get out of the military, and we’re not sure if we should stay here (SD) or move home (Vegas). We are very happy in SD, we love the weather, area, water, parks, schools, etc. On the other hand, if we move home there are advantages too; bigger house with yard we can afford, family and friends, babysitters. Continue reading

“I’m married to a drug addict”

I’m married to a drug addict, opiates more specifically. He goes back and forth between admission and denial, but we’ll call it what it is. I didn’t know how big this problem was until he was fired from his job.

We have two small children that I’ve always stayed at home with, so I’m not currently working. I suspect that he’s taken out a loan and is using it to buy more medications, but he won’t tell me anything about it and obviously the loan officer won’t either. I’ve given him ultimatums without success. Now what?

“Should I let the crush run its course?”

My husband has recently become friends with a woman that he met while on a trip. She is also friends with many of our mutual friends and came to visit. Apparently they stayed up very late one night talking.

He hasn’t told me about it. Also I’ve discovered some flirty messages between them. He told her she was beautiful and he misses her. I’m not terribly worried because she’s not around here right now. But I know she plans on visiting again. Should I let the crush run its course?

“Do we need to move out of my parents’ house?”

I need some advice on how to handle/move forward on a situation.  My husband and I have been living with my parents as we search for our first home. We’ve been married 2+ years and have rented until Nov. 2015 when we moved in with my parents. We were hoping it would be between 6 months to a year for us to pay off some debt, save some money and find our new home.

We have been here now  for 14 months with nice savings in the bank and completely debt free. We’ve looked at houses in and around town. We’ve had nothing but busts. We’ve wasted over $1,000 on inspections and we’re completely frustrated with the process.   Continue reading

“It’s almost a year since we last had sex”

In February 2016 my hubby and I found out we were pregnant. We had a beautiful baby girl in November 2016.

My problem – we haven’t had sex since we conceived our daughter in February 2016! He thinks it’s gross now. That’s literally all he will tell me when I try and talk to him about it.

It’s almost a year since we last had sex!! Thoughts?

“I get giddy for my husband’s co-worker after our foursome sex party”

I’ve been married for almost 3 years now. In the 5 years we have been together, I’ve NEVER once had eyes for anyone else, I’ve just been madly in love and loyal to him.

Until I met his co-worker 3 weeks ago. My husband invited him and his girlfriend over to play pool and have some drinks, and we were all having such a good time getting to know each other. A couple drinks turned into several, then we all found ourselves in a very, very odd predicament….. Continue reading

“My husband doesn’t want to have sex with me”

My husband of two years doesn’t want to have sex with me. I’m a fairly attractive individual, and my husband has NO interest in sex at all. He watches porn all the time, but since he has touched me, it’s been around six months.

And before that, it was another four. We have had sex three times in the span of a year. He says it’s because he has gained weight (70 pounds) and he is ashamed of himself. His attitude towards me is still the same. He still jokes with me, and he’s still my best friend. I just don’t understand what I’m doing wrong. I’ve tried coming onto him, wearing lingerie, buying toys, asking him if he wants to invite anyone else in… but nothing works. He doesn’t want anything to do with it. He is only 30, and should still have a healthy sex drive. Please help.