“Does my friend need professional help?”

One of my best friends is super depressed and I don’t know how to help. He is pretty good at masking it around people, but I can tell. A few years back he started dating his old high school crush and even proposed and she said yes.

Well, shortly after she broke off the engagement, and for whatever reason he has it stuck in his head that she was the only girl in the world for him. Now almost 2 years later he is still really bad off. He got really blackout drunk on his birthday last year and let a lot of his bottled up emotions spill out and even talked about how he has considered suicide.

Since then he has not drank but he did take up 420 which in retrospect is alright since it is an anti-depressant. I have talked to him about it and expressed my concerns but he is very adamant about not wanting “professional” help and not wanting to be put on “chemicals” (medication). He is my friend and I love him but it hurts to see him in pain and not doing anything to seek help. I want to do more but according to professionals if someone is refusing help don’t push it because it can make it worse. So I just don’t know what to do.

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“Do I fix or forget my stuck-in-the-mud boyfriend?”

So, in the nicest way possible, I think I’m dating a loser. I guess I’m the quintessential girl that always dates guys that need fixing, but it’s never intentional. The last guy I dated had suffered emotional / physical abuse and it was complicated, but very passionate and I loved him very much. I kind of walked into a mess on this one. My current bf was still living with his ex’s family when we met, but they had already broken up and he was moving out and back in with his parents before we even got close enough to consider dating, but I didn’t know all this until later.

We were set up, and had two months of mixed signals and odd communication before finally getting together. He was struggling in school and didn’t have many friends because his ex was controlling and also pretty mentally and financially abusive, so he transferred to my university to get back on track with his life. I go to the university he was originally going to go to before his ex convinced him to go to her college , so it felt like he was going full circle. He was passionate and excited and I thought he would adjust quickly and be fine. We were hot and heavy and in love and were a really cute couple, and I felt that it could just go up from there. So I thought. Continue reading

“My parents are constantly fighting”

My parents constantly fight (I’m 12-14.) I don’t like it because my mom doesn’t want to be with my dad anymore, but she is doing it for me because we only have one income and it is my dad’s. When my dad goes on business trips, everyone is much happier, but when he is home there is always fighting.

I really don’t like it and kind of want them to just divorce because it scares me and it has since I was little (5 or so). I think I’m becoming depressed because for a while I have just wanted to die and when my dad is away I feel better. What do I do, because I like my dad but he really upsets me, my sister and my mom when he is home because he is always miserable. Help please!!

“I’m depressed because of my stretch marks”

I’m a 16 year old girl and I have very prominent stretch marks because I’m so pale and because I have gained a lot of weight in the past few months. Recently I’ve been really upset by them because they’re getting worse.

I recently had a really bad fight with my best friend and he won’t talk to me anymore. I don’t handle emotions well because of my depression, anxiety etc. I don’t have enough money to have the operation of the laser removal treatments, so I’m trying to find a way to feel better about them. Right now I feel ugly and fat, like even if I lose this weight I won’t be any better because these are going to be on my body forever. They’re on my stomach, hips, thighs, arms, sides and breasts. I’m just looking for ways to make them fade or even just advice on how to feel better about them. I know I’m overweight and I’m working on feeling better about my shape but the marks really make me feel bad about myself. Anything helps.

“My boyfriend’s cold attitude is making me feel horrible”

I told my boyfriend today that his indifference and cold attitude towards me makes me feel horrible about myself. He won’t call me beautiful, won’t have sex with me, and spends every waking hour he can on his computer and ignoring me.

I told him it feels horrible that I always build him up and let him know how great he is, when in return he won’t even give me the time of day basically. I told him when he rejects me for sex, it’s more than just an “oh man I’m horny thing” and that having sex with him makes me feel sexy and empowered. He cooly responded that he was sorry sex was so validating for me.

I have manic depression and he used to be an uplifting part of my life but I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m in a tough spot as I live with him and feel like if I leave him it would put me in a position where I would need to find a new place and I don’t think that’s possible. I don’t know what to do.

“My drug-using girlfriend is ruining us financially”

A few months ago, I bought a house and moved my girlfriend and her 4 year old son in with me. I am 21, she is 32, the loan and title are in my name only etc. She makes around $16.25/hr and has never had a problem paying bills. Since we have moved into this house, she has been coming short on bills every month and I have to cover her, as well as pay for groceries.

I also do the majority of the cleaning, because if I don’t, the place becomes a wreck. I have found evidence that she has been buying and using pills recreationally. I have found over$100 worth in her purse at a time. When I confront her, she becomes very defensive and upset, but it is ruining us financially. She has severe anxiety and depression. I want to end the relationship but I am worried for her and her son. I know her parents would take them in, but I’m still worried about what will happen and I don’t know how to approach this. I wouldn’t care as much about the pills if she wasn’t lying to me and costing us so much.

“I’m scared that I have depression”

I recently have been feeling sad all the time, like I’d cry a lot for no reason, and the few times I’m happy, it lasts for a super short time. I took a lot on online tests just to make sure I didn’t have depression or anything like that. The first score I received said that I had a score of 87 for depression, so I almost definitely did have it. But I thought to myself, that can’t be right.

I took more and more tests, and they all say I have depression. I’m really scared about this. I want to talk to someone, but I feel like I can’t. All of my friends are all so happy right now, I just don’t want to ruin it for them. My family would never treat me the same if I told them. They’d treat me like I’d break at any moment or something, and that’s the last thing I want. Continue reading

“I’ve developed crippling anxiety”

My boyfriend and I just moved to a new state. We got our first apartment together (although we’ve been living together for almost 2 years) and we’re struggling to make ends meet. Most of the reason we are struggling is because I’ve developed crippling anxiety.

I feel depressed, tired and sick all the time which leads to me hardly ever being able to work. I beat myself up about it constantly and I think its leading me into an even deeper depression. I have no support here besides him and I feel like I’m crushing his soul with my constant negativity. I love him so much, I know he is the one I want to marry someday. But I feel like I am just going to ruin our relationship if I can’t get back on my feet soon. What do I do?

“My mother is ready to press charges against my abusive father”

So my mother, older sister, father, and I live in this house owned by my grandmother. My grandmother and her mother lived next door until my great-grandmother died in late 2015. My great-grandmother was a tyrant and caused all of us to feel like shit, so we figured once she died, my grandmother would be able to live the life that she couldn’t before because of her and would become a lot nicer.

Well, that didn’t happen as planned. She is just as obsessive and mean as she was before. On top of her constant verbal abuse, my father and sister are emotionally abusive to my mother and me as well. My father will yell and curse at my mother for her weight and her job (whether she works her scheduled 40 hrs — which is too few for his taste — or if she works between that and 80 hours — which is too many — he is not satisfied), and he will be upset if the house isn’t kept up to his liking (even though he is the one that trashes it).

He will yell at me for not doing anything (if I don’t go out with friends or work), but will yell at me if I am doing too much (hanging out with friends or working) and is constantly upset with me being in school (since he has to drive me, because I am 19 and not allowed to have my license).

My sister feeds on any drama in the house and will do anything to stir anything up. We have never had a decent holiday at our house between her and my father. They both love to throw things, too — food, keys, television remotes, etc. You can never talk to any of them, my grandmother included, about anything because they will use it against you. Continue reading

“My partner is closeted and ignores me in public”

I’ve been going out with a closeted non-binary person for almost 5 months now. This person is female by birth, but identifies as non-binary, so I’ll use “they” to refer to them. I’m a closeted trans guy, meaning that I’m female by birth, but identify as male.

Since we’re both closeted, we’re viewed as a lesbian couple. I’m okay with this, because we’re not very public with affection and everything, so it doesn’t matter. We’re not having any troubles technically, and I am utterly in love with them and want it to last forever.

The problem is, I’ve been out as “gay” for longer than they have, and I am much more comfortable about being open. This means that they will only talk to me before and after school in the library, when there aren’t many people around. Also, when they see me around school (we’re in different year groups), they just give me a small tight smile and don’t say anything. Continue reading