Tag: sex

“He was sexual with his sister”

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Please help settle this tiff between this couple:

K says:

Okay, so my boyfriend informed me last night that between the ages of 12 and 13, he engaged in sexual activities with his blood sister. There was no penetration, but foreplay took place. He stopped once they were caught by his father. It took 6 months for him to tell me, and I completely understand why it was so difficult for him to tell me.

I feel disgusted and confused. He shows clear remorse for the situation, but also expects me to be calm and collected about it all. I cannot stop thinking of psychological repercussions. I’ve never had a sibling of the opposite sex. Is this normal? He is trying to convince me to some degree that it is not unusual and I just don’t understand.

I know the past is the past, and I love him and who he currently is. My main problem now is the length of time he took to inform me? I believe I should’ve known about this prior to us entering into a sexual and emotional relationship.

R says:

I come from a different culture and a different country — one where sex is much much more taboo in general and not easily accessible. This was somewhat of a common occurrence in my area, and while I do admit it was wrong, I do not see why I even had to tell my significant other. It should have no impact on our current relationship. I was only a child when it happened.

“I had a sex dream about a coworker”

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I’m only 19 and have been in a relationship with a guy for a little over a year. This is my first serious relationship where we both have openly expressed our love for each other. He is my best friend and has been there for me through everything that I’ve gone through in the past year (it’s been a lot of sh*t to say the least). But I often have days where I feel different about him; some days I feel so happy and completely in love with him and other days I question why I’m even with him (even though he has never done anything like cheated or been physically or verbal abusive). Only downside is that I’m not really physically or sexually attracted to him; although sex is almost a daily occurrence.

Anyways now that’s there’s some background here is my dilemma. I had a sex dream about someone I work with whom I find very attractive and sweet and could even say I have a little “crush” on. After having this dream I can’t stop thinking about him. I noticed it has been affecting the way I feel about my boyfriend, but I have not made any of this known to him. I don’t really know what to do now since it has been all I can think about. I have felt this feeling of detachment with my boyfriend before but never because of someone else. Am I just looking too far into this dream or does it mean something?

 

“Is it considered sexual assault?”

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This might get a bit long but I had a fwb relationship with someone I got along with fairly well this past summer. We had a fight over something insignificant but he stopped talking to me without any explanation. I tried to make up with him but he just never talked to me. I hadn’t seen him in 5 months and I felt like he threw me away. He was sometimes really selfish and he would never reciprocate in the bedroom or bother to think about how I was feeling and often complained that I took up space in his single bed. He also made mean comments towards the end of the relationship.

Two days ago he suddenly messaged me telling me he was feeling awful. He got rejected by a girl. We ended up having a deep talk about how he relied too much on women to ease his loneliness for a while and he acknowledged that he caused me a lot of pain. However he said the reason he stopped talking to me wasn’t the fight, it was because he saw my flaws and thought I was really annoying. However, right after saying that he asked me to comfort him and to come to his house the next day. I was worried about him so I did.

Our mutual friend was with us and the three of us had fun drinking together. The friend went home and I stayed at his house. I wasn’t expecting sex, he had just said he relied too much on women, but in the end that was what happened. Now the real problem comes in: technically I am a virgin. I cannot insert anything without a ton of pain so I work around it with mostly only doing foreplay. He tried to get inside me, which at first I didn’t mind because I was hoping maybe it would be ok this time. It hurt so much I was ready to cry and I told him to stop, but for a while he wouldn’t. He eventually did but everything he did was way too rough with me and he would ignore the pain I was in and eventually he would try again. It felt like it was only about his pleasure and none of mine. He wouldn’t even look at me or kiss me. He asked me to turn off the lights. I really don’t know what to make of it or what to do…do I talk to him about it? I know what he did was wrong but is it considered sexual assault? I’m feeling very lost here.

 

“He stopped talking to me when he found out my age”

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I met this guy a few months ago. He is 25, I’ll be 18 next week. I mentioned to him my age, but I guess he didn’t hear me. He found out my age on Christmas eve and cut things off (he has a kid and a steady job so I get why.) Since then he was short, purposely ignoring me, etc.

I had many heart to hearts with him, he changed, but yesterday he went back to ignoring me. He just would tell me he’s interested but he would still ignore me,  yet I know he is talking to someone else because of his Snapchat score. I got onto him about ignoring me and he got upset at me and told me he didn’t wanna fight.

This morning I got tired of it. I told him I was putting off talking to other people and it wasn’t fair when he didn’t care. He came back with “don’t stop talking to other people” and told me to go out and have fun. I told him I was going to delete him and that if he wanted to talk when I did turn 18, he had my number. That I needed to let go. He agreed with that. My friends seem to think he was trying to use me for sex. When I first met him he was all sweet. He never did anything I wasn’t comfortable with. Idk if I should message him after my birthday and ask him if he still wants to talk or what? I truly love him.. Please help.

“Do I tell him I cheated?”

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I met a guy at work during a rocky point of my relationship, who introduced me to his poly-amorous lifestyle. Once we got to know each other, there was some really strong attraction between us, and after some flirting over a few months, we ended up dirty texting each other and slept together twice: once really drunk, and once sober.

After it happened sober, I had an eye opening realization about everything I was fucking up, and how much I love my boyfriend. So I ended everything, and will NEVER cheat again. Honestly made me realize that I want to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend. What I’m trying to figure out is if I should tell him?

I know 100% certain I will never cheat again, and that he is the person I want forever, so I feel like maybe it would be better for him to just never tell him, and that telling him might make me feel better about my guilt, but just hurt him and ruin us in the process. Just looking for some advice from anyone who has been on either side of this scenario, and how you think the best way to proceed is.

 

“I’m pregnant with a felon’s baby”

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I need some advice. Sorry in advance, its pretty long.

Back Story: I met a man in January of 2017 and for the sake of discretion we will call him…Shawn. I met him through work. I am the secretary for the company I work for. I work in the office at a cleaning company, and he got hired as a cleaner. It’s just a small cleaning company and almost 100% of our employees are felons or have done jail time at some point in their life and our company is one of the few that hires “jail birds”. As the secretary, all of the workers/cleaners (mostly men) know me and are very protective of me in a sense, since they are all older men (40+) and I am 23. This particular man got hired in late January of 2017, almost 1 year ago. He was 39, I was 22. For some odd reason, I became immediately attracted to him. He was fine as hell, for a 40 year old man. Even though I knew he was a felon, even though I knew he didn’t have shit to his name, didn’t have a car or money or his own place, even though I knew he had been in and out of jail and prison since he was pretty much 18, even though something about him seemed a little….not right, we started messing around. Discreetly, of course…because, duh, I’m the company secretary, I would die if any other employees found out. Continue reading →

“Could she get pregnant?”

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Inexperienced, so a little embarrassed to ask. But here we go, was fooling around with someone and in the process I premature ejaculated in my shorts (didn’t wipe my penis afterwards due to excitement)  After a minute goes by she says to grab a condom.. I do, it’s dark, and having trouble putting it on, may have put it on the wrong way at first (not sure) .. we don’t get deep into penetration at all, the mood is killed, so we stop. Is it possible for my partner to get pregnant at all due to these mishaps…

 

“I lost my virginity to him and he never calls me”

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Hi 🙂 I’ve been pretty sad lately. All throughout middle school and high school, guys had limited interest in me. As a senior in high school, I got a job at a pizza shop. This was the first time a guy really gave me attention. I don’t think I really knew how to handle myself. We started texting in April and our first date was in May. We had a few dates and then he started getting busy during the day with questionable friends (he hadn’t gotten drunk until he started hanging out with them).

We kept texting everyday until probably late July. Sometime during that time I invited him to sneak over to my parents house at night so we could hang out again. He did and we made out and watched a movie. Then he went on a trip and the texting got sparser. I went on a trip later in early August so we could hang out. Then he snuck over once more before I went away for college about 3 hours away. Continue reading →

“My sexual relations are suffering because I can’t keep it up”

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My best friend/ roommate and I have never had a sexual relationship, we’ve always just been too close of friends. I will say I’ve always been attracted to him and have had desires as such. Recently we were home and one thing led to another, and it happened. Now that the seal has been broken so to speak, we have been having “relations” often. The problem is though, I can’t seem to keep my member up. Continue reading →

“It’s her first time and I want to make it special for her”

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I’m 16 right now and I need advice. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 8 and a half months. We haven’t made love yet, but I can tell she wants to . As a matter of fact she even told me she did, but we haven’t yet.

I know it’s her first time, so how do I make it special for her? I love her with all my heart and I would love it if I could have this be the most memorable moment… any ideas beside the usual candles and rose petals??