“I hate lying to my mom about my feelings”

I’m an 18 year old guy who lives with his mom (no dad.) I’ve been confused about my gender. Earlier today, my mom came home from the store with a big bag of women’s underwear she got on sale, so I stole a pack of them to try on, and now I’m worried she’s going to find out somehow. She seems open minded as I’ve already came out as bisexual, but I don’t know how she would handle this. On top of that, I feel bad for stealing them. What should I do?

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“My boyfriend quit college”

I need help in determining if I am in a dead end relationship. It started in June 2016. I started talking to this guy on Facebook. We both attended the same college and planned on meeting for the first time then. We were pretty much in a relationship when we first met. We have been dating 7 months now.

Last fall semester, he told me he hadn’t been going to class about half way through the semester. After telling his parents, he was warned if he did the same thing in the spring, he would move back home. Which is 3 and 1/2 hours from our school. So the spring semester comes around and he does the same thing. However, he told me in March but it’s been since February he hasn’t been going to class.

He has made specific lies about how he’s in class and has homework and lying to me for months. He tells his parents and his parents tell him he has to withdraw and go back home. So now he is at home and he is choosing to work until he can come back to school. I love him but I don’t feel like I can trust him and also with the distance and his job, I am not sure I will be able to see him as often as I’d like to. Help.

“My drug-using girlfriend is ruining us financially”

A few months ago, I bought a house and moved my girlfriend and her 4 year old son in with me. I am 21, she is 32, the loan and title are in my name only etc. She makes around $16.25/hr and has never had a problem paying bills. Since we have moved into this house, she has been coming short on bills every month and I have to cover her, as well as pay for groceries.

I also do the majority of the cleaning, because if I don’t, the place becomes a wreck. I have found evidence that she has been buying and using pills recreationally. I have found over$100 worth in her purse at a time. When I confront her, she becomes very defensive and upset, but it is ruining us financially. She has severe anxiety and depression. I want to end the relationship but I am worried for her and her son. I know her parents would take them in, but I’m still worried about what will happen and I don’t know how to approach this. I wouldn’t care as much about the pills if she wasn’t lying to me and costing us so much.

“Am I in this relationship because it feels safe?”

I’ve been in a relationship with a guy I met online when I was in high school (I’m currently a freshman in college). We instantly clicked and we’ve been dating for a little over two years. He lives in a different state. He has come to visit twice and it definitely confirmed our feelings. We work so well together and he is my first love, as well as the first person I’ve ever had sex with.

We’re both in college and both very busy but we’ve always made time for each other and while it is a long distance relationship, we are always very connected (we FaceTime, call, and text constantly). In the beginning of our relationship I hid him from my family, however, my parents found out about us and didn’t like the idea of me talking to someone I’ve never met. I spent most of my time on the phone with him and it caused a lot of tension between my parents and I, which upset me because we have always been very close. Continue reading

“Has my boyfriend been seeing someone else?”

I’ve just received some disturbing news from my estranged brother who lives with my boyfriend of two years; he told me that my boyfriend had been seeing one of his friends on the side for the past 18 months. He seemed so earnest when he told me, so I spoke directly to my boyfriend. (On a side note my brother and boyfriend have been growing apart for the past year now and barely stand each other anymore).

He said it was stupid and that it was complete bullshit, and he too looked so earnest and hurt about the accusations and I do trust him. I honestly don’t know who to believe because I trust both of them and they both looked and sounded so earnest. We’ve been together for two years and I’ve invested so much into this relationship that I don’t want to lose it.

My confession is that I want to ask my boyfriend to look through his phone, just to settle my paranoia. Even though I trust him wholeheartedly, I can’t stop thinking ‘what if’ and it’s eating me inside. But I don’t know how to ask without destroying everything in the process. But if I don’t ask, it’s going to destroy me.

“My wife didn’t come home last night”

The other day my wife texts me saying that she is going to work a little later, and if I can pick up our son. She says it won’t be too late. About an hour later she calls asking if everything is going okay, wondering if I needed her to come home otherwise she was going to work just a little longer. I said everything was fine, this is approx 6:00pm. At about 10:00pm I hadn’t heard from her in a while so I try texting, calling, no response.

Then I see her coworker is on Facebook messenger, so I ask the coworker if she could have my wife call me. She then tells me that my wife told her that she was going to work from home that day. I tried calling and texting my wife 20 times with no response. Finally I get a text from my wife saying, “yeah I lied, I’m out with my friends and I’m not coming home tonight”,  and I didn’t hear from her until the next morning. Should I be concerned?

“My husband looks at other women on the internet”

I don’t know what to do when it comes to my marriage. Let me start from the beginning…

About a year and a half ago, I went onto my (then) boyfriend’s computer to check my bank account. I started typing ‘Bank of America’ into the browser, but as soon as I entered ‘ba’, a bunch of history sites for backpage.com popped up. I didn’t know what it was, but I also saw ‘escorts’ in the web address. I then looked at his history and saw that he looked these pages up. When I confronted him about it, he said he was just curious. He said he had read they do a lot of sting operations, and he was just curious to see if the profiles really were fake. Continue reading

“He says he’s committed to me, but he wants to keep living with his ex”

My entire relationship has been a series of “do this and be this way, and we won’t have any problems.” I have a hard time being controlled and breaking down walls to trust people. Finally, after all my efforts and much wear and tear emotionally, I have given in to every request.

That is not the problem, though. My issue is the last two years, I’ve been getting serious. After the ring and time invested with one another’s children, I feel betrayed and manipulated. I have been accepting of him living with his ex and kids half of the week. He would assure me they were done over and over again, yet he had me tip-toeing around her because I shouldn’t “rub it in.”

It recently came to light for her that he and I have been together. She is accepting of it now. Only problem is, he admitted to having sex with her monthly to make sure she was being faithful. Now that he wants to stay fully committed to me, and she knows about who I am, he has stopped and doesn’t want to do it. Continue reading

“My wife’s friends are tearing apart our marriage”

My wife has a best friend who gave her advice during a difficult time in our marriage. I did all I could to patch things up and become the man my wife wants me to be, but she continued to listen to the friend. She dogged me out, asking why I was calling her on Thanksgiving while deployed.

Upon returning, I had a suspicion that something was going on, so I took her phone and found text messages between my wife and her friend, dogging me out. I came home one day and found prepaid cards lying around, and she said she was throwing them away from work, but I later found a phone card in a drawer.

Later, I caught my wife lying three times about having a prepaid phone which I had discovered. I told her to cut off the relationship with the friend, because it’s destroying our marriage and because she consistency lies to me. I am honest, open, and trying to love my wife through arguments and disagreements we have. I see my mistakes of the past (no infidelity) and try to work out things. Continue reading

“He let his friend drive my car and lied to me about it”

I am dating a guy. We recently went out of the country together. When we were away, he let one of his guy friends (whom I have never met) drive my car, and he lied to me about it. I found out because I found a receipt in the car, and when I asked him about it, he lied initially. I asked him again, and he came clean. I was annoyed, but tried not to get too upset about it. I have a tendency to overreact. He didn’t understand my being upset. Was I wrong for being annoyed by this?