My girlfriend of two months has her ex-flings (not ex-boyfriends) in her phone contacts and in her social media (Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat), including one she was flirting and talking with during OUR talking stage. She claims to not have entertained anyone else after we became “official.” Either way, this irks me, and I don’t know whether or not I’m being insecure or if I should say something because she should cut them all off. I should mention that I was hurt in my past by a cheating ex, and I have major trust issues that I am working on. What should I do?
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Sometimes old flings become old friends and mean nothing more. Unless they have given you define reason I would explain your feelings in a neutral setting and leave it be. Use words like “I feel” and no finger pointing. If it still bothere you with no real reasons talk to a counselor to work through issues you brought from your past relationship that your girlfriend is innocent of and shouldn’t have to deal with or be punished for.
Put yourself in her shoes. Say you had a fling and you and your fling realized it would not build to a relationship so you became friends or aquaintences. Suddenly your new girlfriend demands you cut them off because she was cheated on in a past relationship. You would feel irritated for lack of trust and the demand of her cutting off your old friend. That’s something people in abusive relationship’s do.