“I’ve lost my self-worth after sleeping with a married man’

So to keep it short, since about April I have been involved with a married man. He is 37, and I am 25. I too, am involved in a long term relationship so I guess we both could relate on some of the issues that we have been dealing with in the both of our relationships, which in turn sort of started the whole affair.

We both agreed to trying our best at not developing feelings, which was totally cool at first. But lately I’ve been having strong feelings. I feel a lot of guilt on so many levels, and I feel so worthless ever since we started sleeping together. Each time we have sex and he leaves, I can’t help but due to the shame that I feel. It’s like he takes a piece of me each and every single time he leaves after we are done.

I really want to break this off, especially knowing that our relationship will never be anything more than what it is. But sadly I have fallen for him. I have nobody to vent to, and it’s eating me up inside. I’m just curious as to how do I let this guy go? How do I emotionally and spiritually pick myself back up again? How do I get my self worth back again? He took it all from me.

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“I told her I was fantasizing about her friend”

So this is the stupidest thing I have done yet…… a few days ago I got home from work, everything is fine, she was fine and I don’t know what came over me I decided to tell her that I had fantasized about one of her friends. With that said it changed the mood of the whole house. She stopped talking and being non responsive.

I know at that moment I messed up, I tried to explain at the time but it made things worse, I have never seen her this angry before. She has given me the silent treatment for 2 days now. I don’t know what to do. I don’t mind if people judge me for having those thoughts I know it’s a mistake and that because I am married I should only be faithful to my wife but I don’t even know if that counts as cheating. Do I wish I can take it all back? Of course, do I wish I never have those thoughts? Definitely. At the moment I am just waiting for her to forgive me but it feels like I am on death row. Please help?

“Are his lies a deal-breaker?”

He didn’t cheat, but his lies don’t add up.  I say lies because I know they are. He’ll try explain one thing but I’ll question him about it again and everything he says contradicts his previous story.

He argues that he forgets and his memory isn’t good, but there’s just this feeling I get. I do trust he wouldn’t cheat on me but I think he has previously texted other girls suggestively and when I question him about it, he brings up my past and guys I previously chatted to before we got together.

I don’t know if I’m overreacting or thinking too deep but is this a deal breaker? Should I end it?

“My wife wants to sleep with other people”

My wife announced that she wants to sleep with other people. She claims that our sex life is bad, and she is not satisfied. We had incredible sex just the night before and she thoroughly enjoyed it. I know her, and I know when she is faking and she wasn’t.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t want her to cheat, but she is convinced she won’t be happy until she gets to sleep with someone else.

“We are both having affairs; can we be together?”

I’m his Mistress and I’m married, but he’s finally divorced and starting a new job.

I know I shouldn’t expect anything different but we’ve been together for 3 years and he’s leaving to start a new job. On the one hand we’ll have more time together in the evenings because he’ll have his own place, but on the other hand he’ll be surrounded by new colleagues including women that will be interested in him since he’s attractive, successful and now technically single. Continue reading

“My husband beats me and cheats on me”

My husband and I just moved to a new home in a different town. He promised me that this move would be good for us as a family (we have a kid together) and that he would do better and help out more (I work a full time job at home and take care of the bills and the home ,basically on my own). My husband’s temper has only gotten worse the longer we’ve been together… He’s already hit me and choked me a few times… When he actually DOES get a job he can’t hold it for longer than a month because he’s always threatening his coworkers and going off on his bosses.

He’s talking about going to the military and while part of me is excited to FINALLY be able to relax and get some real help (financially) another part of me is scared that he’s gonna end up one of those military men that beat on and cheat on their spouses (he’s already cheated on me 5 times.)

Maybe this is a stupid question but what do I even do at this point? I can’t leave town because he broke my car. Every time I try to throw him out he guilts me into letting him stay to work it out but then talks a bunch of crap behind my back … He doesn’t help with our child, just closes him in his room until I come out of my office during my lunch break or when I’m off… What do I do?

“My boyfriend of 6 years is texting another girl”

My boyfriend and I of 6 years have broken up and have been broken up for almost 2 weeks now. We’ve been dating since high school. Ever since we’ve broken up, not much has changed. We still see each other everyday, he’s still on my phone plan (we have a great rate) and are pretty much on this break to work on being better so we have a stronger relationship once/if we get back together.

Yesterday, he kept telling me that he loves me and that I’m his best friend and that more likely than not, we’ll be together in the end. I felt that he brought it up kind of randomly and that there was something peculiar about what he was saying. With lack of better judgement, I look at his phone records and it says that he’s been texting someone.

He had been texting this person since 8am all way until 12 at night. This morning I confronted him about this just to see where we stand and if he is moving on to someone else. He says that they they are “just talking” and they are “just friends”. In the last six years he has never had any female friends, he works a retail job for his parents and only has 2 coworkers that he always complains about. I even looked up her name and the area that this girl lives in, which is not in our local area. He says that he loves me and just me and cares about just me and that he’s only interested in investing his time in me.

I find it kind of hard to believe that I’m the only one, when he texts somebody else 15 hours a day. He says it’s not going anywhere. And today he even texted her at like 6.30 in the morning.

Should I trust what he tells me? I feel that his actions/reactions are not adding up. Is it really that likely that if a guy and girl were texting for 8am-past midnight were not interested in each other? For those of you who are familiar with the show Friends, I am Team Ross. I don’t think my ex is doing anything wrong by texting her, but I don’t believe that he has feelings for just me as he is trying to lead me to believe. I am looking forward to hearing advice from outside parties. Please indicate if you are a male or female so I can understand your perspective. Thanks.

“I cheated on my wife then gave her an STD”

I have been diagnosed with gonorrhea. Got from my sexscapdes outside of marriage. I am taking antibiotics now and getting better. I haven’t told my wife yet. But I think the symptoms are starting to appear on her. I just told her to have herself checked.

Im really confused because if I tell her then she’ll probably leave me. I think by the time she is diagnosed mine will be gone already. What do you think should I do? Thank you.

“Pissed at my boyfriend who slept with a married woman”

My boyfriend told me that he slept with one of his good friends who is a married woman for a few weeks just before we got together, and that they’re ‘good friends’ now and are planning to meet up soon when she’s back in the country. Her husband still doesn’t know and she doesn’t plan on telling him.

I told my boyfriend that I’m not comfortable with this morally and that I think he should be firm with her that this is wrong and that she needs to tell her husband, and if she keeps refusing to do so that he should tell her husband as a last resort and also cut all ties with her. He says that he can’t do all that.

Am I being unreasonable?

“I can’t get over my girlfriend cheating on me”

This is a long story. I’m a freshman in college and have been dating this girl for 6 months. We have told each other we that were in love and want a future together. There’s just one thing I can’t get over.

Before we were officially dating, we kind of a had a “thing” going. We went to each other’s fraternity/ sorority formals and what not and had sex. However; at a party, I was helping a friend who happened to be a girl, who was very intoxicated. Someone seeing me sit down with her on a couch assumed I was “hooking” up with her. I was not. This person told my now girlfriend this, and she ended up leaving with another guy and having sex with him.

I know this might seem like it was a misunderstanding but it hurt me more than anything I’ve ever experienced. She apologized the next day and I gave myself days to think it over. I decided to give her another chance and we began what is now our 6 month relationship. I am happy being with her, but when I think about this night, it brings back a lot of pain for me, and I just haven’t fully gotten over it.  Should I still be in this relationship?