“My wife’s friends are tearing apart our marriage”

My wife has a best friend who gave her advice during a difficult time in our marriage. I did all I could to patch things up and become the man my wife wants me to be, but she continued to listen to the friend. She dogged me out, asking why I was calling her on Thanksgiving while deployed.

Upon returning, I had a suspicion that something was going on, so I took her phone and found text messages between my wife and her friend, dogging me out. I came home one day and found prepaid cards lying around, and she said she was throwing them away from work, but I later found a phone card in a drawer.

Later, I caught my wife lying three times about having a prepaid phone which I had discovered. I told her to cut off the relationship with the friend, because it’s destroying our marriage and because she consistency lies to me. I am honest, open, and trying to love my wife through arguments and disagreements we have. I see my mistakes of the past (no infidelity) and try to work out things.

I caught my wife lying to me about being at one location when, in fact, she was supposed to be with the kids. She lied to my face while seeing another female best friend, whom she endears. I am at a loss. My wife continues to talk with these two friends, despite her not seeing they are tearing apart our marriage. What is a husband to do? Am I right for asking my wife to cut them off completely, so they an live their lives to themselves?

Two kids are involved. We are high school sweethearts. No infidelity on my part, unsure of my wife, but she states there is none on her part.

One thought on ““My wife’s friends are tearing apart our marriage”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I’m going to be blunt and you won’t like my advice.

    Ok open and honest, you cutting her off from her friends. She should be doing that, but she also knows your history of issues and cutting her off from her friends is the sign of a bad relationship. Abusive relationships do that. Not healthy ones where the partners trust each other, aka not searching her phone when she’s probably venting about you and following her around cough stalking cough.

    If she trusted you not to be a abusive partner then she would see that these friends are unbeneficial to your marriage, but she doesn’t, and you’re not giving her good reason to with your demands and stalking.

    See a marriage couselor now. My crystal ball predicts divorce in your future otherwise.

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