“Is it a discredit to my father-in-law and husband?”

My mother in law was married for 5 years before she married my husband’s father. She had a son (H) from her first marriage and subsequently her first husband died.

Her first husband had a small life insurance policy. After his death she worked as a preschool teacher until she married my father in law (RR) who was a successful attorney. She quit working then and had another son (RR JR now my husband).My father in law invested her 40k – put 20k in one trust fund for her 1st son H and the other half went into a trust fund for her. Money was never withdrawn. My father in law went on to adopt her son H. Considered him his own and paid for his education which included private school and eventually medical school. Fast forward almost 50 years. Both trust funds – my mother in law and H’s are now worth about 2.5 million dollars. H has had complete access to his for many years and the dividends have paid his mortgage payment for many, many years. When my mother in law died last year, it was made known that she wanted her entire trust fund 2.5 million to go to her first son. And it did.

Her reason was that the money came from his birth father. While the starting money (20k) came from her first husband -it was only allowed to invest and grow because my father in law took care of her and her son.

My husband does not appear outwardly upset by this – but I can’t help but think it is an ultimate slight and discredit to my father in law and husband.

What do you think?


2 thoughts on ““Is it a discredit to my father-in-law and husband?”

  1. Anonymous says:

    It was her money then. It was hers to do as she wished. Do not get involved. You will lose. Also, if you want family to stay family, don’t voice your thoughts to them. If your husband is ok, then why stir the pot? If he is not ok then get counseling and show him love more than his mother did monetarily.

    P.S. I’m sorry for your families loss.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I think she’s dead and you can’t bring her back to change her mind. It was her money to do with as she liked and you seem to be trying to make it your money. Legally there isn’t anything you can do if she left a will. You’ll just make everyone in the family think poorly of you and it makes you look like a gold digger. It doesn’t even bother your husband. Move on from this as a bigger person.

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