“My marriage is falling apart”

When I met my wife, she was in normal fit shape, and her natural body and face is 10/10 beautiful, like unbelievably so, to the point that she could get whatever she wanted whenever she wanted it. If she could sing she might be famous. But I was not interested in her because she seemed so into getting attention for her looks. It put me off.

At some point she actually gained a lot of weight, like 100 lbs really fast. I was friends with her during that time (not necessarily close) and never really considered being with her, I was honestly concerned for her because she had gained so much weight incredibly fast and she would literally be dead now if she had kept that up. She eventually lost most of that weight. We got together when we ran into each other and she helped me with a place to stay on campus at our school, after a bad breakup that left me with no place to live for awhile.. As we talked, she explained how she had started focusing on spirituality in life (not any specific religion, same as myself) and I fell for her. I made a mistake believing that she had changed. I made several mistakes. I thought I would be on her side by acknowledging how her body had changed and supporting her to be mentally and physically healthy. Continue reading

“I love her but she’s moving”

So I’ve been dating this really amazing, friendly, and funny girl for the past six and a half months, but she’s recently been offered a job that’s quite a long commute from where she’s currently living. Obviously, this means that when she moves, she’ll be moving closer to her new workplace, and further from me.

I genuinely love this girl, and want what’s best for her, but at the same time, I’d rather not have things end because of this. We get on really well together, we seem to be on the same wavelength when it comes to certain things, her values align with mine, we’re both vegetarians, and we have similar interests. As well as this, I have Asperger’s Syndrome, so I tend to be pretty awkward due to my issues with social interaction. While some people might be scared away by my awkwardness, she loves it.

I’m more than willing to try a long distance relationship. The place she’s aiming to move to isn’t super far away from where I live, so it’s definitely doable even if I won’t be able to see her as often as we do currently, but is it possible for things to work out between us?

 

“I can’t get promoted because I’m female”

I’ve worked for the same place for two years. I just was promoted when I found out that the position I’ve always desired, would be unavailable to me because I am a female, and this position is available (in our establishment) to males exclusively.

I have always declared my desire to attain the position and was only told, reluctantly, after many repeated requests about the position that because I was female, I would not be entertained for it. I feel extremely hurt. I have not quit, but am at a loss for what to do. I love my current position but know that I won’t want to stay in it forever. I want to grow and promote. I don’t know what to do.

Everything I do feels so tainted by this, and I’ve lost an enormous amount of respect for our senior leader. He is not sexist and insists I am doing an amazing job. He is respectful and kind. He enjoys hearing myself and other women communicate (I am communicator) and is very encouraging. I am so torn about what to do. Unless he changes his mind, I will not be promoted and will only be able to move laterally. I will never be able to have equal material benefits or social benefits of the title. It’s become harder and more confusing, and though I try not to be, I find it hard to be as excited as I once was, about the work we do. Everything is now yellow colored and dull instead of green and alive.

 

 

“How do I get him to communicate?”

So long story short, we moved away for around a year and opened a business, the business didn’t work so we have recently moved back to our old town and my fiancé has started working at his old job again, but with a promotion to management!

Recently though he has started working lots more hours because of the new job title, so myself and my son never see him much these days. I know as I am writing this that its probably all due to stress and tiredness, but it’s like he has completely stopped communicating .

He is such a doting dad but when he is home he just sits on social media watching videos, I ask him how his day was etc try to get him to talk, but I get 1-2 word answers, then he goes back to his phone, he used to take my son to the park and that has totally stopped now too.
I know he isn’t cheating or texting anyone because his phone faces me when he uses it but it’s just frustrating, I feel like the spark in our relationship has gone out and I don’t know how to relight it!

Can anyone help? How do I get him to start talking again, I don’t need much but right now I feel like he doesn’t have any interest in me anymore and I’m worried he isn’t in love with me anymore.

“She’s angry that I want to work on my career”

I have been in a relationship with a young woman (she is 20 and I am 23) for about a year now, and she gets angry when I spend time away from her to advance my career.

We are both in college and I am an art student. We both also work. I have told her before that I plan to spend 50 to 60 hours a week in the studio for the rest of my life, attend shows, classes, lectures and exhibit openings, and that these time commitments are rarely, if ever, negotiable. I invite her to as many of these as I can, but it’s rare that she actually wants to join me. Many of these events do come up on short notice as well, but I always give plans priority in the order they were made. Continue reading

“I’m not lazy, I’m insecure”

I’m a college senior with an English major and a music minor. I’ve finished 75 of the required credits, I have 49 credits left to graduate, that means I’m taking 18 credits in the Fall of 2017, I’ll have to take 18 credits in the Spring of 2018, and at least 13 in my last semester to graduate in the Fall of 2018.

I also was born with Spastic Hemiplegic CP, and I suffer from dyscalculia as a result. I tried to go to the Disabilities specialist for my school with documentation of my disability to see if I could get out of the math core, but they wouldn’t budge, so I have to take College Applications Math (Finite Math) to graduate, even though it’s likely that I’ll never use it again afterwards in my life. I tried to take the three credit Finite Math class, and even got tutoring. But my grade wasn’t getting above an F in the class, even with all that help, so I dropped it. Now, I’m going to be taking the four credit Finite Math class, which is slower and covers some remedial topics. But I’m still not sure I’m going to be able to do it, even with the best tutoring. Continue reading

“I have to choose between a career and my family”

My parents are strict: doctor, lawyer, engineer. You know typical high pay employment. I like arts. I like it but more importantly I like being able to choose my focus, my topic. If I’m not interested in it, the outcome is pretty brutal.

They don’t really recognize that I detest the topics related to those jobs (doctor, lawyer, engineer). So basically I am stuck between gambling my options; trying to pursue a career in the arts, without my family supporting me, or I can give up what I love, and possibly make some good money, and have my family.

I’m lost. Very lost.

“I dumped my boyfriend over a job he took”

My ex boyfriend and I work in the same industry. Essentially he accepted a job working for someone who screwed me over. I asked him not to take it, he agreed, but the next day called me at work to tell me he took the position, and I was so furious I broke up with him. Part of me understands, the money is good. The other part of me is enraged and hurt, and betrayed. Did I overreact? It would be our 3rd time breaking up, and probably the last. I am so incredibly sad.

“I don’t know what to do with my life”

I plan on becoming a police officer and I am currently studying a bachelor of policing. However, I don’t have much work experience and I am an extreme introvert and shy. I don’t really have many things I am good at, and to get a part-time job you need so much experience, or qualifications, and to get qualifications it costs too much. I don’t know where to start.. some help please?