So, I was having doubts about my relationship, I would say for probably a few months, prior to when I finally kind of just took a stance, and said that I didn’t want to be with him anymore.
Now I”m feeling somewhat shaky, and wondering if I should get back together with him, also he keeps trying to tell me that we are meant for one another, and that I’ll have regrets.
Some background info on what brought on these serious doubts: my boyfriend, around 10 months into the relationship, told me that he lied about having gone to school, and getting an English degree. At the time when he told me he lied, I just quickly overlooked it, because I didn’t think it was important.
The thing is though, the more I thought about, the more I realized how actually significant that was for him to do. Here I am thinking all this time, that he’s just doing his present job (being a sous chef) because he can’t find a career in his field yet. It got me thinking; if he can lie about something like this so easily, what else could he lie about?
Obviously, it’s also made me really question whether or not we actually could have a future together. Maybe it’s superficial, but I want someone who has direction going on in their life, and who is striving for something (he’s 24 and I’m 23.) Other past issues that I just can’t seem to move past, is the fact that he put me down a lot , and has called me names, judging me for my past sexual history.
What’s got me still kind of on the fence if I want to get back together with him, is that I can feel that he genuinely loves me, but yea it’s hard to kind of forget that he lied to me about something so significant, and the verbal abuse I had to go through many times, near the beginning of the relationship. At the time, he explained that it was just situation-based and was because of his insecurities that he was struggling with at times. What do you guys think? Do you think there is always room for forgiveness and a chance to wipe the slate clean and try again? I think what’s getting me is that I still love him, but I guess I’m finding it really hard to see a promising future with him right now.