“When do I buy her engagement ring?”

1 Comment

I’m planning on proposing to my gf after a year of travelling, and I don’t know whether to buy the ring before leaving or while away. If bought while we’re away and something goes wrong with the ring once we’re home it could be complicated to fix and get sorted.

If I buy it before we go and we’re staying in hostels, it could be risky, as it could get lost or she could even find it. Even if I bought it here, taking it away could be difficult in my luggage, or on my person with the metal detector lol! Anyone have any advice on what to do?

“I’ve moved on but feel guilty”

2 Comments

I cheated on my lost-distance boyfriend of 4 years, with a guy I’ve known for a while (who was in the same city as me), but who was dating my friend at the time (he cheated on her also).

My boyfriend (“Adam”) and I had been falling out and I was having some issues that he sort of ignored, while the other guy, we’ll call him “Wade”, paid attention and asked me about them and was really there for me when I needed it. Continue reading →

“How do I get my ex to leave me alone?”

3 Comments

Hi there, I’d like a little advice about trouble I’m having with an ex. To start, I want to say I’ve been happily married for a few years. I’m turning to you because I have an ex who continues to pop up in my life randomly.

When we were together, she broke up with me because she said her mental illness didn’t allow her to keep an interest in any one parter for more than a year. It was the first time my heart was really broken, and it took me some time to recover. I had thought at the time this was the person I would marry. Continue reading →

“Am I jealous or is he being shady?”

2 Comments

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 3 years now. He dated a girl we’ll call her…..”L”…….about 2 years before me. Bf and L dated for only a year. I found out he was still friends with her on social media accounts, no big deal, I’m not THAT jealous.

Then one day I see her name pop up on his screen notifications, she snap chatted him. I get weirded out, ask if they’re still in touch (to my knowledge they weren’t). He says not really. So I snoop later on (bad I know) and find they’ve been snap chatting each other back and forth. Continue reading →

“Do I lose my virginity to him?”

2 Comments

I started dating this guy on September 16th, and my birthday is October 12th. He’s my first real boyfriend, my first kiss. But is it okay to give him my virginity? Especially if there’s no way to hide that from my parents, who told me not to give my virginity to my first boyfriend? He’s planning something sexual for my birthday, he’s already hinted at it. He’s said things like, “me, you, and nobody else.” I really want to do it, but I’ll be turning 16 and I don’t know if it’s okay to give my virginity to my first boyfriend, especially after having been with him for only three weeks, give or take a day or two. So, can I give him my virginity, taking all this into consideration?

(P.S: Yes, we’ve said we love each other. And I really do love him.)

“He doesn’t listen to me”

1 Comment

I just feel like my boyfriend doesn’t listen to me. We have been together 3 years and sometimes I feel like he just doesn’t listen. His best friend is constantly getting too friendly, if you understand what I’m saying, and I try to tell my bf about it and he just thinks it’s all a joke and doesn’t take me seriously.

“How do I get him to communicate?”

2 Comments

So long story short, we moved away for around a year and opened a business, the business didn’t work so we have recently moved back to our old town and my fiancé has started working at his old job again, but with a promotion to management!

Recently though he has started working lots more hours because of the new job title, so myself and my son never see him much these days. I know as I am writing this that its probably all due to stress and tiredness, but it’s like he has completely stopped communicating .

He is such a doting dad but when he is home he just sits on social media watching videos, I ask him how his day was etc try to get him to talk, but I get 1-2 word answers, then he goes back to his phone, he used to take my son to the park and that has totally stopped now too.
I know he isn’t cheating or texting anyone because his phone faces me when he uses it but it’s just frustrating, I feel like the spark in our relationship has gone out and I don’t know how to relight it!

Can anyone help? How do I get him to start talking again, I don’t need much but right now I feel like he doesn’t have any interest in me anymore and I’m worried he isn’t in love with me anymore.

“I found out she cheated on me 4 years later!”

2 Comments

My question is this, I’ve been in a relationship for 4 years. I just recently found out that back when we first started talking and about to start dating, she had to take a trip to go get a divorce that was already in the works, finalized.

When she went to CA from FL to do that, she ended up fucking someone there she used to hang out with (before she left for CA we were having sex,) then she asks me to pick her up when she got back and at the time I didn’t know she did this till now (4 years later.) So now in my head I just realized that we had sex, she left, had sex with someone, then came back and had sex with me. Should I be allowed to be mad? In legalities, we weren’t officially dating from her words.

“My companion just disappeared”

2 Comments

I’ve been having a rough couple months. Nothing seems to be going right, and it’s been really hard to smile lately. My relationship with my family, as well as my lover, has been slowly deteriorating. I’m currently taking a break from any intimate relationships, but I was always, always seeking for a friend to talk to. It got things off of my mind, even if just for a moment.
It became a sort of coping mechanism.

One ever-so-fateful night, I found myself in some random chatroom with another person. We stumbled under the same topic category and he was very pleasant to talk to (none of my close friends were up at the time, or were far too busy for me to approach). We talked about absolutely everything. We had deep talks about religion, society, and any intellectual thing imaginable. At the same time, we spoke about quirky references and memes. It felt like we had known each other for years (as exaggerated as that sounds). It just felt so different. I had never connected with anyone so similar to me before.

Later on, he decided that we should keep in touch, and so we did. We added each other on a chat-based app and messaged one another. A couple of days hereafter, we became fast friends, to say the least. I’ve never been one to act impulsively, nor upon my emotions.. But something about our interactions made it so easy to open myself up to him. He asked why my lover and I took a break, and he gave me insight as to why I should love myself instead of worrying about my current relationship status. I’m a very pessimistic person, and he brought a very insightful perspective unto me. One that I needed to hear after all the other shit I’ve been going through. I hadn’t smiled so easily in such a long time.

Now.. neither of us were foolish. We didn’t rush into anything sexual. And it was absolutely wonderful how we could care less about being touchy and affectionate with each other. (We lived quite a ways apart, so I wasn’t expecting anything). I was sure to make clear that I wasn’t ready to be in any sort of relationship anytime soon, and I was happy to know he respected that. There was even a time when we distinguished that we fit into the “demisexual” side of society. We both looked down on one-night stands and summer flings. Emotion and a personal connection always came first to us, and I never sympathized with anyone so deeply about these ideals. Several times, however, he showed interest in me. They weren’t bold statements, but they were surely there. His cunning, subtle little flirts made my heart swoon. He had an incredible way of saying things that he knew I would appreciate.

For about a month, however, he stopped messaging me. It took a lot amount of courage to initiate conversation with him again. He didn’t reply the first time, but I caught him online a couple weeks later, and we conversed once again. He apologized for not getting in touch with me sooner. His reasoning was that he didn’t want me to emotionally invest in whatever was happening between us. But honestly, I was perfectly ok with being friends for a while. In fact, I didn’t really want him to be a lover right off the bat. Our friendship was absolutely beautiful the way it was. His company was all that I needed, and I felt as though he sought my presence, as well.

Days passed again, and it just seemed like we grew a lot closer. I actually started getting excited to see him message me back. This hasn’t happened in a long time. I’ve had feelings for my previous lover for 8 years, and I haven’t quite emotionally invested in anyone ever since. But this quote and quote “friend”? I felt as though he was about to beat that long-time record.

The first time he asked me to watch a show with him while speaking to me on the phone, I couldn’t stop smiling. He had stayed up messaging me and out of the blue, he proposed it as if it were a date. I later reminded him that I didn’t want to hurt him because I was still figuring things out with my lover (we are still broken up), and, as if to make me feel better, he suggested to watch it with me as my friend. I willingly agreed, but when the time came to watch it with me, he was unable to do so. I forgave him the first time because we both hadn’t slept the night before. He had slept through the appointed time. But, the following day or two, he brought it up again. He boldly suggested that we try again on Tuesday (which was yesterday). And again.. He didn’t show up. I just feel so devastated.

Last Saturday, I noticed that he wasn’t on my friend’s list anymore. My intuition screamed at me that he removed and blocked me. I pretended it didn’t bother me.. But slowly, I grew more and more disappointed. Everything had ended so abruptly and I was taken aback. He hadn’t done a single thing to upset me until now, and he seemed to enjoy my company. He seemed like a very reasonable young man, and I felt as though we connected uncannily well. I had never hit it off with someone this well in such a short amount of time, and now I’m just in utter shock. He’s left without a single trace and I tried to add him back.. Only time will tell if he’ll ever see it.

I honestly just wanted to get to know the guy. He was so intriguing. It wasn’t every day that I stumbled into someone who enjoyed conversing about deep obscurities about life,and then immediately switched the conversation to memes. I cannot deny that I developed a sort of crush on him; but being his companion was more than I could ever ask for.

Would he be worth pursuing? Had I done something to upset him? Would any of you have any ideas as to why he just up and left?

 

 

“He says we’re married, but we’re not”

3 Comments

I have been in my relationship for almost 5 years. We have 2 daughters, 2 and 3. We have been engaged for almost 3 years. He cancelled the venue & plans for the wedding about 4 months after he proposed. Said that we needed to work on our relationship before we made it legal, he has been married once before, so he is reserved.

Now, he says we are already married, that when we consummated, we were married. He has very different points of view. We have never taken vows or are legally married, but he insists that we are. He is constantly sharing his ideas with me, points of view on a variety of subjects but when I don’t agree, he says I am wrong and says I should think as he thinks.

On the surface, we are great together, we joke & laugh regularly & I love the family we have together. But any time we speak about important subjects like core values and beliefs, we disagree every time. And he says I am wrong, that it’s all me. That I need to take a look at myself and make some changes. But he isn’t willing to see my point of view, I’m just wrong. I asked if he would be willing to go to counseling with me, he refused.

I feel exhausted all the time. I am filled with anxiety at every moment, and I always have this knot in my stomach. He said to me a couple weeks ago, “it’s your job to make my dick hard, not my life”. That was a slap in the face & I haven’t been the same since, but he saw NO WRONG in it, said I perceived it wrong. I don’t know what to think anymore. I just wanted to share. I’m so lost.