“I’m in love with a felon”

I’ve fallen madly in love with a man who served 26.5 years in prison for a murder (gang related) he committed when he was 19. The ironic thing is I was dating him when this happened. He pursued me for years before I would take him serious. He was trying to quit the gang life for himself and me.

I wrote him for a year and moved on with my life. Decades later he paroled and found me. He said he never stopped looking for me and always thought of how things could have played out so differently if he wasn’t such a fool as a kid. When we are together it’s like we are teenagers again. I’m lonely in my marriage of 18 yrs, but I have financial security & stability (premium medical insurance – retirement) with my husband. Although we have only been intimate maybe 3x in the last 5 years. I sleep in a separate room – It’s my choice as I’ve lost attraction for my husband since he began chain smoking and drinking excessively. Plus, we don’t really have much in common. I’ve stayed in this marriage for my child. And also because I didn’t want to break my husband’s heart.

Although often times he’s very depressing for me. When my past found me, I was truly happy to hear from him but I never in a million years expected to fall for him & feel the spiritual, mental, and physical connection that has evolved in the past year. We spend so much time talking about everything. Initially I thought – hell no – I would never get involved with a felon. But he amazes me with his resolve to make up for lost time and work hard to make something out of his life. He makes me feel alive and inspires me in ways no one else has ever done. We have so much in common. We have so much fun together and he’s constantly reminding me of the small yet more important things in life. He’s nothing what I expected. I feel guilty for having this affair. What should I do??…. please, any feedback would be appreciated. Thank you in advance.

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2 thoughts on ““I’m in love with a felon”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Visit a counselor because you are practicing a form of escapism. You need to get clear of a marriage before starting anything new.

    Your new old beau is going to lay it on thick, because you are most likely the only life line he’s got to mooch off of. You are a smart woman for realizing that. If you run after him right now while still in your marriage you will not only ruin your marriage (which I don’t know if it can be salvaged or not, but a licensed marriage counselor or professional can help you better with that than strangers on the internet) but all your relationships connected to this marriage (kids, church, friends, parents in law).

    Suddenly YOU will be the one without the life line even if your husband is terrible, which you are going to need once you find out that your new old beau hasn’t honestly changed and you’re stuck with a mooch who can’t work past fast food if that, or just smokes weed on your couch while not working and claiming he’s going to get a job, blah, blah, blah.

    Good luck internet friend.

  2. raina says:

    I was in love with a felon 24 years ago. Didn’t end well had a child. 24 years later I still love this man. Always will.

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