“My intuition has been pulling me in a direction but I’ve been fighting it”

I have been with my kid’s father for almost 5 years, but broke up after 2 years and then got back together to work things out. We broke up because he said what he was looking for wasn’t me, but then we tried to make it work again and this time around things were going so well.

Then slowly but surely, things have gone back to what it was before. He makes me feel like I’m not doing enough in the relationship and at home. I’m a stay at home mom of 3 kids and I’ve only stopped working for a year to care for our 4 year old and 11 month old twin girls. All I do is cook, clean, do laundry, run errands and tend to our children, with no help from him, I’ve asked, I’ve begged, yelled and cried to him about it and still nothing. I just feel like something is missing.

I’ve had this “friend/acquaintance” for about 6 – 6 1/2 years. We’ve never actually met, only spoken on the phone and text or messaged through Facebook,  and we’ve both wanted to meet but I’ve been in a relationship almost this whole time.  I’ve developed feelings for him and I find myself missing him even though we’ve never met. I feel so bad because I’m in a relationship with my kids’ father but I know he’s talking to someone else like he has in the past and it hurts because I don’t want to give up on my family but 5 years and no signs of progress.

I feel like we need to go our separate ways and maybe I should give this guy friend a chance because for years my women’s intuition has been pulling me in his direction but I’ve been fighting it. What should I do???

One thought on ““My intuition has been pulling me in a direction but I’ve been fighting it”

  1. Anonymous says:

    End the relationship with the father first and give yourself some time to get your act together and heal mentally/emotionally before you go after someone new. You’re going to have to deal with new living arrangements, child support, getting yourself a job, because child support will not take care of everything. Plus now you’ve got to work and do all the house work plus child rearing solo. It’s going to be hard, but worth it in the end. There is no guarantee that this new man will make things better. He’s just a form of escapism from your problems in front of you right now. Until you get your life together and handled by yourself you are just adding fuel to the fire with a new relationship.

    Here’s something to think about: with three kids (who are definitely not going to deal with a break up between mommy and daddy for a while) you won’t have time to devote to this new relationship.

    I would try couples counseling first and then if that doesn’t work start getting your ducks in a row. Without a job your soon to be ex could take the kids from you and YOU be the one paying for child support.

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