Tag: dating

“What can I say to let him know that I have a boyfriend?”

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I had crushes on 3 people in October, and I gained some confidence, so I told one of them that I liked him in November. I see him at school every day in a lot of my classes and he’s also at my bus stop. He told me that he’s not ready for a relationship and all that ‘generic’ stuff and kind of started talking to me less after that.

Then, in early December, I found out that one of my other crushes, the one that I liked the most, liked me back. So, now we’ve been boyfriend/girlfriend for more than a month and I haven’t really told the other guy that I have a boyfriend. He’s starting to talk to me more again, and I’m pretty sure he thinks that I still like him. While I don’t hate him, I also don’t want him to say something like he’s ready for a relationship now, and I would have to say no. I’m not the kind of person who likes doing that. What can I say/text to him to make him know that either I have a boyfriend now, or I don’t like him like that anymore without being that direct?

“My girlfriend wants to hang out with her exes”

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All of a sudden, my girlfriend says she’s no longer happy with me and started to want to change who I am. At the same time, she started hanging out with her cousin more, who has just become single. He has many guy friends, which my girlfriend had previously dated.

Every time she goes to hang out with her cousin, and she tells me they only hangout at his apartment, she gets fancied up. But no longer does that for me. I’m trying to figure out if I could trust her now, in the past I could, but recently not as much, due to her wanting to hangout with him more when her ex-boyfriends are around. Can I get some insight?

“Should I date this guy who’s younger than me?”

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I met this really cool guy on Periscope a couple of weeks ago. We texted a lot, Facetimed, and we really vibed. So we decided to meet up and hang out this past week. It was cold and rainy so I told him he can just come over to my house. We hung out in the living room, watched basketball, talked, etc. Then it started getting really flirty so he moved in for a kiss. We literally made out for the next couple hours, him just holding me in his arms and showering me with kisses. So sweet.

Now here’s the dilemma. Yes, I like him a lot and he wants to hang out again BUT he’s 21 and I’m 28. Is that too much of a big difference? He says he doesn’t care about my age and he seems pretty mature, but guys are really good at saying exactly what you want to hear. I even told him I was concerned that we don’t want the same things, and he said “What do you want? A family? How do you know I don’t want the same thing? I’ve had my fun and I’m looking forward.” I just left the conversation as is because I really didn’t want to get too deep, too serious, too quick.

Should I give it a chance? Just let things unfold? Or should I just back off? I mean I fall for people really hard and I don’t want to get hurt again. I’m still trying to get over my ex too, who so happens to be a really close friend of mine. My friends are giving me mixed feelings. Some think I should give him a chance, some think I should run, and some think I should just talk to him to get over my ex.

Ugh this is extremely frustrating. I’m freaking 28 and can’t handle simple dating!

“I can’t stop thinking and talking about him”

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I really, really like this guy, who also happens to be a good friend. I’ve known him for almost two years and felt nothing romantically towards him at first, but after getting to know him, I realized I like him more than a friend.

He often gives mixed signals, we’ve matched on Tinder about a dozen times now, but we don’t mention it, and I know he’s matched with some of his other friends. He’ll message me almost everyday, about little things like his cat or asking for help with college work, or gossip, or something bad that happened to him. He will also try drag out the conversation as much as possible. Continue reading →

“I love him but his family hates me”

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I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 3 years, and we have a 6 month old son together. But lately it feels like I have to constantly remind myself why I love him. His family hates me, and makes me miserable almost every day of my life, and it’s been this way for the last three years.

Every time his mom or sister calls, I get a pit in my stomach wondering what they are going to say, and my anxiety goes through the roof when we go to visit his grandparents. I just don’t think a relationship should be this way. I have tried talking to him about it again and again but nothing changes and we just end up fighting. Every day I wonder what my life would have been like if I chose someone else, and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I love him, I do but I’m starting to wonder if it’s even worth it at this point?

“My relationships always go downhill after sex”

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Hi there. I just started dating this guy. We knew of each other for a little while, but recently have been talking/texting every day for almost a month. We have hung out one-on-one before, and I can tell that he really likes me. He says sweet things like that and is affectionate.

The problem is that I have these bad memories of dating guys or being interested in guys who used me, kept me around just to hook up with while being dishonest, and now I associate having sex with “the beginning of the end.” Continue reading →

“I’m dating someone for stability”

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I’m not claiming to be a great person but I’m dating someone for stability. I didn’t realize that was what I was doing until I really looked at the situation. He has a house that he asked me to move into, I’m saving money, I have a companion, and I get to be closer to my family. Everything sounds good on paper but there are a few downsides.

I’m moving several hours away from where I live for him and the only time I’m really attracted to him is when we’re having sex. He doesn’t give me the emotional support that I’m craving. He was so kind before we started dating but as soon as we put a title on us (which he pushed for) he became distant and cold. He’s one-worded and I feel like he doesn’t care about me. He has no problem going two days without any kind of communication (which is a big deal to me since this is long distance right now.)  When I press him on it, he apologizes and is okay for a day or two before reverting back to old habits. Continue reading →

“Should I say ‘I love you’ first?”

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We’ve been dating for 7 months now… traveled together many times and everything seems to be fine. I already feel in love with him but never said it. He keeps telling me that he thinks I am a great girl but it’s too early to judge me. He also talks about how he’s not emotional and how he hardly says “I love you” to his family members. Should I go ahead and say it first? In all honesty his actions show that he really cares and does have feelings for me but he never says it straight up.

“His twin brother wants to date me”

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So about 5 or 6 years ago I was occasionally talking to this guy. Nothing serious. We texted sometimes, maybe had 2 phone conversations but never dated or anything. The first time we hung out we ended up having sex. Next day went on as if nothing happened. We only had sex one more time after that before we just eventually drifted to other interests I guess you can say.

Fast forward 4 years later, me and my girls would chill out with these guys that my friends grew up with. Guys were really chill… liked to genuinely have fun and yada yada. One of the guys always flirted with me and eventually made it clear that he liked me so I asked a few people about him to see what vibes I would get. One source revealed he had a twin brother.

OMG! Once that was said to me it made sense why he looked so familiar of another person – the guy I slept with years ago.  Ever since learning this, I basically friend zoned him. I never once revealed that I slept with his brother because frankly it wasn’t something I was too excited about and I didn’t want it to change how they viewed me. His brother in question moved down south and started his life there with a whole new family. Been there for a while and doesn’t seem to come back to where we live anytime soon. So me and the current brother have actually been on a date because he always asked but I felt bad after. IDK, like I  feel like it’s inappropriate and also pretty gross in a way but then again this happened yearssss ago and the family has a new life somewhere else. What should I do?

“Why do I have so much anxiety about my relationship?

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I’ve been dating this guy for a year-and-a-half, and I’m scared of us running out of things to talk about, and of him falling out of love with me. Also, I’m scared of us not lasting, and honestly, our relationship gives me anxiety. It’s been like this since the beginning of our relationship.

I know there probably isn’t a clear-cut answer given only this description, but I was wondering if you could tell me what’s wrong with me. I mean everything about our relationship is great. We haven’t even argued yet. I don’t know why I have so much doubt in us, so I was wondering why do I feel like this?