“I love him but his family hates me”

I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 3 years, and we have a 6 month old son together. But lately it feels like I have to constantly remind myself why I love him. His family hates me, and makes me miserable almost every day of my life, and it’s been this way for the last three years.

Every time his mom or sister calls, I get a pit in my stomach wondering what they are going to say, and my anxiety goes through the roof when we go to visit his grandparents. I just don’t think a relationship should be this way. I have tried talking to him about it again and again but nothing changes and we just end up fighting. Every day I wonder what my life would have been like if I chose someone else, and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I love him, I do but I’m starting to wonder if it’s even worth it at this point?

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3 thoughts on ““I love him but his family hates me”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Whoa now gental lady! You love him so he and you need help vs. the family. Start out with couples counseling and setting boundaries. You can’t just up and leave him with your six month old son unless he’s abusive. He’s always going to be a part of his life. Plus you’ll have to discuss raising your child, child support and so on.

    Next look into getting treated for post partdum depression. Don’t just shove that off and definitely bring it up in counseling. It’s definitely not easy. I had it after a traumatic birth with my daughter. It happens to the best of us and when you’re hormones are crazy, you can’t deal with everyday stuff. Not to mention crazy family stuff on top of everything.

    Remember he loves you too and it’s hard being stuck in the middle. These people raised the man you love, so I would hope they have some good points.

  2. Anon says:

    I really wish I had any advice, but I kind of feel the same. I have not yet met them, but I have such a deep anxiety and suspicion that they already hate me due to how our relationship started. Good luck ❤

  3. Dave says:

    OK, listen close young lady…

    Every one of us, boy and girl…

    We all someday choose a special person to be a part of our life, to fill a role that NOBODY ELSE CAN FILL. Usually, we call this person a “husband” or a “wife”. But the important thing to note here is that a person can FILL the role of “husband” or “wife” long before any marriage license is applied for. Anyway, when we find this special person, we form a new family with that special person. It is a new family of two people (JUST TWO). Eventually, the two might have children. But the most important part, the soul of the relationship…remains JUST TWO PEOPLE.

    Now, to keep the marriage healthy, some sacrifices need to be made. You both need to make your significant other the number ONE priority in your life. That includes specifically your mother, your father, your siblings…your closest friends…

    In fact, you will know that you are devoting ENOUGH time and effort to your marriage when your parents and friends are complaining (loudly) that they never see you anymore.

    From reading your question, it is clear to me that the father of your child is not ready to be married yet. In fact, it will probably be many years before he is ready to be married. He’s making his family the priority in his life. Either he’s not ready to be married, or he doesn’t consider YOU to be marriage material. Either way, you need to drop him. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news…

    Don’t expect him to “change”, either. People don’t change…

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