“People at my school are calling me a terrorist”

I’m in high school and I’m Indian. I live in an area without much diversity and most of the people are white. I’m being bullied by a lot of people and they’re calling me a terrorist.

I have tried telling the school staff and they’ve called the students’ parents and since then they’ve stopped saying it to my face. I still hear about the things they say, though, and it’s upsetting me because I know if I tell the teachers again, it will make them hate me more and just make sure I can’t hear about it anymore. They would do that instead of stopping because they realize they’re being racist. I don’t know what to do, please help.

“I need to know for sure if he likes me or not”

My male best friend just left for bootcamp for the marines. I think I’ve fallen for him though. I care for him so much I would honestly take a bullet for him, and I wouldn’t do that for just anyone. He’s the most loyal and caring person I know, and we all know how hard it is to find someone like that these days.

Whenever I was upset and told him I needed a hug, even if it was midnight, he would actually drive over just to give me a hug and make me feel better. He had also told me how, if he survives the marines, he would like to settle down and start a family. And I’m actually willing to wait for him, no matter how hard it might get. His guy best friend, we’ll call him C, has been trying to get us to date as well. C asked my best friend if he would date me, and I tried getting C to tell me what my best friend said, but he just replied with “Bro Code” and left it at that.

My best friend has done so much for me, and has always been there for me, whenever we got food he would never let me pay, he always helped me get in shape, whenever I asked for anything, he would get it for me, but I just need to know for sure if he likes me or not; if he doesn’t, then at least I could have the closure to move on and find someone else over time, while keeping our friendship intact. I would do anything for him, but would he do the same for me? Please help me.

“My life is a mess and I’m completely lost”

I’m completely lost. I don’t know what to do. I feel like my life is a never ending spiral of failures. I’m 16 and I know, “I have my whole life ahead of me”, but do I really? Every single Honors student know what they want to do with their lives, and then there’s me. To be honest, I don’t even think I’ll live past age 20, let alone finish College and University.

My mom hates me. She keeps me as a prisoner in my own house. And that’s not to sound dramatic or anything, I’m actually not allowed to leave the house. I couldn’t even go to my friend’s graduation back in May. She never let me leave the house over my summer break, she doesn’t let me hang out with my friends.

I’m a good girl, good grades, top test scores, AP classes, but none of that means anything apparently. To her, I’m just a sex crazed idiot like “teenagers are supposed to be.” She won’t even let me get a job. And there’s the fact that she constantly cheats on my dad and forces me to keep it a secret (this has been going on since I was about 7.)

I get bullied. Endless racial jokes about me being Mexican, come at about every second. And if it’s not a racist joke, it’s some insult about how I’m a ‘prude.’ It’s gotten to the point that I can hear their words when they’re not around. I feel like the walls around me are quickly closing in and I have nowhere to go. Please, what am I supposed to do?

“Do I tell him about the cheating, or keep my mouth shut?”

I would like to get something off my chest that has made me sick to my stomach since the day I found out. I work with this fella that has been messing around with a married lady… that’s on her for putting herself in that situation and not being faithful but it’s on him for continuing with it. She was recently married a couple years ago. You ask me why is this your problem?

Well coming from a marriage with a cheating spouse this kind of hit home for me. Not only did everyone lie to me that knew about my husband, but I literally tore myself apart just to find the god awful truth. If a stranger or someone that was around them when it happened would have came to me and told me, it would of saved me a lot more time and heart break.

So I am asking for advice on if I should contact him about how shitty of a wife he has, or simply keep my mouth shut. I feel bad for her husband and dislike the boy I work with, but I believe I owe it to the cheated on spouses. Please help!

“He has other women all over his Facebook page”

On my boyfriend’s Facebook page he has nothing but a bunch of women with nice bodies. Some have clothes on, some half naked. I feel a little intimidated sometimes because I don’t have a model shaped body and I wonder if he ever looks at me differently after he looks at them.

I think it’s disrespectful because now he’s in a relationship and even though he had the page before me, it’s more of a respect thing to me. I don’t have a bunch of random naked men on my page. I only have people that I went to school with, men and women.

I don’t know if this should be a issue but this bothers me and I told him about it. He deactivated his page, but not for long. So how should I handle this issue or should it even be a issue or am I over thinking about this?

“My girlfriend never mentioned me to her mate”

He’s frustrated that his girlfriend hasn’t mentioned him to her friend. She thinks he needs to back off, and it’s just a trust issue on his end. What do you think?

Pete says:

We’ve been seeing each other intensely for six months. We’re in love, but she admittedly is a private person on the whole.

We went on a double date with her best mate a few weeks ago. It went well, I thought. My girlfriend had told me previously that she’d told her friend about me, and I saw nothing to disbelieve that.

Yesterday she opened a text from her mate saying “how are you” etc., but within the text, it said, “how’s things on the man front?” I found this odd and disrespectful to me and our relationship. I asked my girlfriend to say that WE were great. My girlfriend agreed it was odd, as she’d given her no reason to think she was anything other than with me. She refused to acknowledge that wording in her reply and didn’t even mention me or us. This has knocked me a bit.

H. says:

I agree with everything above and did think it was an odd thing to put, but I decided to dismiss it as nonsense. Secondly, it got my back up that he told me how I should reply. I’ll speak to her face to face about it. I think it’s a trust issue that he wanted to see it in black and white.

“I’m disturbed after discovering my husband’s social media accounts”

My  husband and I have been married for 6 years through arranged marriage. We have a son (5) and a daughter (2). He was never on Facebook, whereas I have been for some years now. He never seemed inclined and I didn’t fuss over it. However, a few months back out of curiosity I searched his name on FB and realised he had opened an account for more than a year.

When I asked him, he shrugged off stating he never really used it and had opened one on insistence of his colleagues and to connect with friends from his days abroad. When I asked him why hadn’t he added me? He just avoided it saying he never uses it. Nevertheless, I added him and though he seemed reluctant, he eventually accepted it. I checked his account and indeed most people on his friends list were his colleagues from work and few old friends. He had a picture from his late 20s as his profile picture (he’s 40 now). He hadn’t filled out any details and he hadn’t put a single picture of us or our kids. I was not too happy but I thought he wanted to keep things private and professional and let it be.
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“I don’t know if she is there for me or not?”

I have this friend who I’ve known since first grade. At first we weren’t that close but since I started losing people left and right, she’s been all I’ve had and I love her like a sister and appreciate her being there through everything.

As the years have gone on, I’ve noticed a change. It’s weird because it’s never a constant thing, it’s always changing, but basically she goes through these phases where one minute I’m her bestie then the next she appears to act like I’m an annoyance that she has to keep up with. Continue reading

“My boyfriend encourages me to flirt with my teacher”

I have been dating my boyfriend for nine months now, and I love him to death, but sometimes I don’t get the emotional love and attention I would like from him. I have been taking a class at our university this summer, and my lab GTA has been increasingly flirting with me over the course of the class.

My boyfriend encouraged me to flirt back and even offered up a “hall pass” to help me pass the class (I thought he was joking – he’s not). I feel incredibly uncomfortable that he would suggest that, because I would never cheat in class (let alone get involved with a teacher) or on my boyfriend.

My problem is that I don’t know what to think about how my boyfriend is acting towards the situation. My other problem is that I genuinely like my GTA as a person, and I would really like to be friends with him. He is obviously flirting with me, and I don’t know how to pursue a friendly relationship without him thinking I was leading him on or using him for a good grade.

“Am I being unreasonable about this guy?”

This is a long post, but it’s a long story.

I recently moved back to my hometown after a few years. I also started talking to my ex boyfriend and after a lot of misunderstanding had reached a happy plateau of agreeing to hang out occasionally and as he put it ‘get to know’ one another again. Parallel to this he also in love with a girl at his work who doesn’t seem to reciprocate his feeling and has heavily put him into the friend zone. So I assumed it was safe to build a friendship.  Continue reading