“I don’t like the way he touches me”

I have had many problems with my boyfriend but we always work it out. Or at least I thought we did. We had a big fight recently and he confessed a lot of feelings he had kept bottled up for a long time and the thing that bothered me the most was the way he talked about a problem we had with consent.

I told him I didn’t like being touched many times and almost every time he tried I would move his hand away and/or tell him no or to stop. He has stopped since we had a very serious conversation about how violated it made me feel when he ignored me and kept insisting and guilt tripping and pressuring me to do things I didn’t want to. He ended up crying and apologizing over and over and said he didn’t realize what he was doing and he stopped doing things I didn’t want. But when we were fighting he brought it up and said “oh yeah like when you apparently felt like I ‘assaulted’ you or something” and asked how I can touch him and then “act like” I don’t want him to touch me. We’ve had a lot of misunderstandings because of the way he sometimes words things incorrectly but I really don’t know how to go about this.

One thought on ““I don’t like the way he touches me”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I think you two need a couple’s counselor. He shouldn’t be throwing that in your face and he should be respectful of your boundaries. At the same time maybe he needs someone who wants a lot more PDA. A mediator should help you both find out what you need better. If he won’t go, go by yourself.

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