This is a long post, but it’s a long story. I recently moved back to my hometown after a few years. I also started talking to my ex boyfriend and after a lot of misunderstanding had reached a happy plateau of agreeing to hang out occasionally, and as he put it ‘get to know’ one another again. Parallel to this he’s also in love with a girl at work who doesn’t seem to reciprocate his feelings, and has heavily put him into the friend zone. So I assumed it was safe to build a friendship.
Enter my messy life. I recently started Tinder-ing out of boredom. As it’s a very small town, I matched with a guy I’ve known at college and we seemed to really hit things off. BUT sadly he is one of my ex’s good friends (more bro, without their being much love between the two of them they are very active as a friend group of guys).
I then got bored of super cheesy chat up creepiness on Tinder and deleted it. This guy then started talking to me on Facebook – as we’d been friends for years. I didn’t think it’d be an issue so I stupidly never mentioned it to my ex – who had made it clear many times there were no romantic feelings between him and I.
Fast forward a few weeks (I had been on holiday and I didn’t really pursue his conversation) and we went on a sort of ‘hang out’ date to test the water (a trampoline park as not to make it too formal). We hit it off very quickly, and I couldn’t help but like him … so we then dated for a couple of weeks and he seemed really happy.
But in that time my ex cancelled his plans to meet up with me (he made excuses) and removed me from social media. He then wouldn’t talk to me about it on the phone and generally cut me out of his life without reason.
Throughout all of this the guy I was dating said it’d be fine and that he didn’t feel it was an issue. But then out of the blue he cancelled a meet up and told me he didn’t think it’d work because of the ex being his friend.
What is annoying about this is that he knew about my ex, he told me we were okay to date still and then he got cold feet when it made his life awkward. He did tell me he’d talk to my ex and ask him the reason – but never bothered to tell me. He just said he’s sorry he’s been a prick and I’m a lovely girl.
I’m okay with being dumped because things possibly were not clicking romantically, but not when the guy tells me he likes me and it’s just because it’s making his friendship difficult.
Am I being unreasonable? Either way, I feel a right tit.