Should I be mad about this? I caught my wife cheating on me with … ME.
My wife is (EXTREMELY, like ready to divorce me) mad at me, because (ironically) she thinks I cheated on her. Long story involving a lady who was a friend of mine (never even kissed her, actually) and a years-old email message from my friend that that I’d totally forgotten about. Until my wife (snooping through my old email messages) went batsh*t crazy over it, that is.
So my wife decides she’s going to solve all of her problems by spending THE RENT MONEY to go out alone with her “gay” friend (I’ll call him Mike) and get plastered.
She calls me at 1 AM to come get her. She’d spent about $150 of the rent money, I assume on drinks for the two of them. But when I found them, she was buying takeout food for him. Could have killed them both, but there was a young child home (asleep), so I was mainly concerned with getting my drunk wife home fast.
Back in our apartment, I carried my wife in (too drunk to walk) and set her on our bed. She slowly got undressed until she was totally naked. Then she pulled me over on top of her, and she was making out with me and trying to have sex with me. Basically, she made it very clear that she desperately wanted my penis inside of her vagina, to put it bluntly. But while she was doing that, she paused to say (very clearly), “I have to go home now.”
After a few seconds, that sank in. So I decided to set her straight. I announced in a very clear voice, “BABY, you ARE HOME NOW.” Then after a few seconds, she was cussing and shoving me away from her.
So basically … She desperately wanted to f*ck me when she thought I was “gay” friend Mike. When she realized I was her husband, suddenly she wanted me far away from her.
Next day, her female friend is acting as moderator, as we are both too p*ssed off to talk to each other. Her friend says I should forget about what happened (the previous night), as she was drunk.
In my mind, the fact that she was drunk was yet ONE MORE REASON I should be mad at her. But everyone I’ve talked to so far doesn’t think it’s really that bad. In fact, some think it’s kinda funny. Yeah, I can see how it would be HILARIOUS if I had not been there …
Opinions?
LemonVibe 
I think you should really let it go I think she didn’t meant to do it otherwise she wouldn’t have called you to pick her up both of you should just forget what happened I hope you make the right decision because when we love someone we should know how to forgive
She was already hurt and plastered out of her mind, so I know this will be hard, but you need to forgive her. You two need more help than a advice forum can give. I don’t what exactly caused her to snoop, but you both need to seek marriage counseling now.
Agree with Anonymous above. It sounds like the two of you have some deeper issues that you can’t address in on a dating advice site. Assuming both of you want to fix these issues, I would recommend seeking counseling.
Often times people use alcohol as a way to escape. Then an excuse to do what they wanted from the beginning when they didnt have the courage to do it sober. I say, put your footdown. No more drinking unless u are there. There will be lots of other “gay men” willing to step in. The problem is your wifes lack of respect. When a woman is cheating or thought she cheated, her mind is mentally checked out. Where her mind goes, her heart follows. To prevent a divorce fix the internal issues and keep your foot down.
Well, you have to admit this would make a great scene in a movie, but because it’s happening to you it’s a nightmare. You can’t control her or force her to change, if you just “put your foot down” she’ll resent you more. If you guys can try counseling that would be great, but all signs point to someone basically trying to get out of the marriage or is desperately unhappy. But just to play devil’s advocate, when one is that drunk it’s typical to go in and out of “micro-sleeps” so perhaps she fell asleep for a flash and didn’t realize where she was and said she had to go home when she saw some guy on top of her. Who even knows? The incident isn’t the only problem here unfortunately.