“I think my ex and his roommate are both gay”

I recently broke up with my partner because i found out he was into trying to meet up with transgender women from craigslist and similar sites. I’m the only one who knows he’s into that stuff, and i feel like he lies about it to his (our) friends, but then again it’s none of my business what he does with it (as long as he’s not doing it while dating me).

I recently found out that my ex’s roommate told my girlfriend that he (the roommate) is gay, but she is the only one that knows (then again telling her anything is like trying to save your water in the colander) and she told me. I’m the only one who knows that they have the love of penis in common.

Is it my place to do anything about it? I feel like they’re both torturing themselves by hiding it and could help each other out. i have tried to hint to them that they need to have a good deep talk but they are both stubborn and are kind-of homophobic (outwardly at least). I don’t like living with so many secrets! What’s one to do?

3 thoughts on ““I think my ex and his roommate are both gay”

  1. Somebody says:

    It’s possible that they aren’t. Consider this: trans women are women. It doesn’t matter if they are post op, pre op, or no op. They are women. If you genuinely identify as a woman, you are a woman.

  2. somebody says:

    I’d also like to point out for the sake of clarity that you don’t get to decide someone else’s sexuality or gender identity. Even if you think someone is gay, it’s not up to you to “help” them unless they ask you to. Outside of that it’s just not your business. There are very real reasons people who aren’t straight don’t “just come out” and if you out them you may very well be putting their life in danger.

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