“Why do I feel guilty for being happy after she divorced me?”

I’m a 45-year-old male, retired military, and professional. I was married to a women for 16 years, and after numerous deployments and significant separation, she texted another man. Not sure what else happened. In return, I cheated on her. We both made some bad decisions.

I confessed mine to her — and my unhappiness with her behaviors — and in return, she filed for divorce and aired out dirty laundry all over Facebook and to our small community. I started thinking about why, and I realized that I had become a paycheck to her and not a companion.

She has no respect for me — and I none for her. We have no interests together, and she put forth no effort in making a home for us, except to keep up with the other wives in appearance. I would come home to no supper, an untidy house, and piles of dirty laundry, even though we had made an agreement that I would work outside the home, and she would work inside the home and raise our kids. Continue reading

“My boyfriend got drunk and pissed in our son’s crib”

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years now. We have a one-and-a-half year old and a two week old.

Over the years, after he gets drunk, he sometimes will get up in the middle of the night, walk somewhere, and just piss. Once, he pulled his drawer out and pissed in it. Another time, he just sat at the side of the bed and pissed. It’s as if he’s sleep walking though as I’ve tried waking him up, and he just yells at me that he’s pissing, and I’m rude for trying to stop him. It doesn’t happen too often but it seems to be happening more often now. It uses to be only when he drank hard liquor but now it’s beer as well, it just depends on how much he drinks I guess.

He never remembers doing it in the morning, and always says he will clean it up but I’m always the one to clean up after him and I’m sick of it. Tonight is really it for me. I’m done with it, but I just don’t know what to do about it. Continue reading

“My boyfriend is abusive, but I can’t afford to leave him”

I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for five years, and we have a three-year-old daughter. We have a lot of issues, though. Should I stay? How do I leave?

My boyfriend doesn’t support my dreams. He tells me I can’t do what I love and that I am too much of a dreamer. I want to be a teacher and travel someday. On top of this, he doesn’t have much ambition to do anything great in his lifetime.

He is verbally abusive often and sometimes mildly physically abusive (throwing food/small things at me, breaking my things, etc.). He says things to me on a regular basis that most people don’t hear their whole lives. Horrible things that cut me deep. He blows things way out of proportion whether its me or some other factor that upsets him.

Continue reading

“Should I stay or should I go?”

I’m a mum of a lovely two-year-old who I love with all my heart. I’m with her dad at the moment, but we had a bit of an off/on relationship, although we’ve been together for about 10 years.

Problem is, he makes me feel so low about myself sometimes (especially after he’s had a drink). Even when our daughter calls out for mummy when she wakes up in the night, he blames me for “over-mothering” and making him feel like a bad father! I am a very hands-on mum and work in childcare. so my daughter spends a lot of time with me. which I personally think is great. as we have such a great relationship. But he makes me feel guilty about this so often!

Continue reading

“Learning to trust again”

Me and my partner were together for 6 years, we always drank a lot socially and he did drugs before we got together and very rarely when we were together as I really don’t agree with drugs.

Anyway we had a daughter and I hardly drink at all now but he started drinking more and more and did drugs at our home one night when I was out with friends (our daughter was with her grandparents) I left him over this as it was the last straw for me, we split up for over 6months and he’s drinking and drug habit was a bit out of control but he didn’t drink when he had our daughter. We decided to give things another go a few months ago and things have been OK, he rarely drinks now but I am finding it so hard to trust him and keep wondering if we’re only together for the sake of our daughter although we get on well etc.

Continue reading