Tag: moving in together

“He worries about money and never initiates sex”

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I have recently moved in with my boyfriend of over a year. I love being with him, but two things have bothered me since we moved. First and foremost, he is extremely concerned about money – this would be normal, but he has approximately 1000 dollars more than me currently, and I paid for all of our furniture/home essentials/most of our food.

Given that I don’t drive, he gets very upset about spending gas money (we hardly drive anywhere and he drove all the way home without me this past weekend, 3 hours away). It got to the point where we really needed another trash can, and he wasn’t going to buy one because a large one in Walmart was $10… so I caved in and bought it. It took him 2 weeks to pay back his $80 share of our internet/router. I really don’t have much money left but he expects me to pay half/more than half our groceries.

The other thing is, he just doesn’t seem attracted to me anymore. If we have sex I am the one to initiate, and he barely touches me and normally just wants me to get on top of him. We spoke about this and have had good sex twice since (I initiated though).

The money thing is very, very, very uncomfortable for me though, and I don’t even know how to bring it up. He gets very angry and acts like I’m crazy/doesn’t believe that I’ve paid for as much as I have. My stress levels have been through the roof and I’ve been crying and panicking a lot. He seems confused about that, too, and gets frustrated with me very quickly when I show any emotion or am not super happy or active. I think he may be stressed and acting like this due to that in part. But I need outside perspective. My friends are a little biased.

“I love him but his eyelids disgust me”

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We’ve been dating over a year and moved in together a couple months ago. We get along great, never fight, he is very attractive to me, we have great sex, we are emotionally open, have a lot of fun, and I honestly couldn’t get along better with a boyfriend if I tried.

But myy boyfriend has really noticeable veiny eyelids, and whenever he raises his eyebrows they show up like “Bam! Here I am!” I’ve started obsessing over the veins and hating to go in the daylight with him because I know when he raises his eyebrows his veins are gonna disgust me. I’ve tried ignoring them, tried to make them into something funny in my head, tried to trick myself into thinking they make him unique but I always go back to “ugh, I’m probably gonna have to stare at those forever if we stay together”.

But, I know that if I break up with him I’d lose a wonderful man. He’s so kind, smart, would do anything for me… and I feel like I’m being shallow and I don’t know what to do. I have told him about how I feel and he said “well there’s nothing I can do about those” and he’s right… So what do I do? I know most people will say “either get over it now or move on” but I can’t get myself to do either.

“My boyfriend’s roommate needs a room for his shoes”

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My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years. I am a mother of an almost 3-year-old. Being in a relationship with someone that had a child is hard on both ends of the relationship. My daughter comes first before myself or anything.

My boyfriend has a house he shares with his roommate. My boyfriend and I talked about moving in together, but he wanted to check with his roommate to see if he was comfortable with the idea. The house has 3 bedrooms and a basement. My boyfriend has a room upstairs, while his roommate uses one room to sleep in and the other room as his shoe/game room.

When my boyfriend told me it wasn’t a good idea for us to move in, he told me that moving us in would be forcing his roommate out and that his roommate had waited two years to have that extra room for his shoes. I understood the factor of not being comfortable with having extra people in the house, but it bothers me that my boyfriend agrees that his roommate having a shoe room is more important than my two-year-old daughter having her own room. Continue reading →