I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 2.5 years, and the last year has been long distance. He is without a doubt my favorite person in my life and the best guy I know. We have so much fun together and he is incredibly kind and thoughtful – the type of guy many women dream about marrying and starting a family with.
He is completely devoted to me, but for some reason I can’t get doubts out of my head that something is not right. Even though I really love him, I’m not as attracted to him as I would like to be. This has caused a problem with our sex life because I don’t particularly want to kiss him or have sex with him. I like making him happy but I don’t get much pleasure out of it. I usually just try to please him as quickly as possible so it’s over with. I have expressed this to him and he thinks that it might just be that I’m not a very sexual person and that our relationship is fine, but I have some doubts.
I haven’t had a lot of experience outside of my boyfriend, but I know I have enjoyed kissing other men. Everything else in our relationship is great, but I’m concerned that I’m either forcing something that isn’t meant to be, or that I’m possibly sabotaging a great relationship by freaking myself out. I’m worried I am going to wake up in ten years and feel that I missed out on something, but I also don’t want to let my incredible boyfriend go. Is there anything I can do to overcome this lack of chemical attraction? Do you think we have any hope if the sex does not get better? We are both 26 by the way.