After a heartbreak years ago, I’ve since been on a weird Tinder spree. I was a virgin at the beginning of the year, and have since slept with seven or eight men.
The trouble is, along he way I’ve met a couple of guys I fell hard for, which make me decided to delete Tinder, because I can’t keep reliving this cycle of heartbreak and then needing validation. I’ve never been in a long-term relationship and have absolutely no idea how to handle one.
I’m used to flings and someone telling me they don’t want something serious. I feel worthless as if hookups and meaningless sex is all I can ever expect/deserve. How can I get out of this hookup loop and just find someone I can steadily date?
2 thoughts on ““I keep falling for guys I meet on Tinder””
That sneaky oxytocin- it’s called the cuddle chemical, due role in love and bonding. When women have sex with someone, and especially when you orgasm- that stuff gets delivered to you in spades. It feels GOOD! When someone who provides that ‘rush’ leaves, so does the oxytocin. If it’s a guy you really like, it may literally seem like you are craving them- so it’s a lot like withdrawal. As much as our biology wants us to hook up indiscriminately, especially while we are ovulating, our oxytocin can often convince us that a handsome yet unknown entity needs to be our baby daddy.
If you think you may fall for a guy- figure out (as best you can) what his intentions are before hooking up. If you want to sow your oats- I may want to find someone who you know can remain ‘one night stand’ material.
What I would do is delete tinder and tell people your only looking for a serious relationship. Joing a dating website where people want a serous relationship. Thsts the only way.