My wife left me in January after only eight months of marriage. She said she was “100% sure” she couldn’t be happy with me, and that she wasn’t in love with me anymore. She said that I work too much (she wasn’t working at the time). She said awful things to me about my appearance, my personality, and my ability to be loved. I was torn to a million pieces.

She moved out of the house, and while I told her I wouldn’t ask her to love me anymore (that doesn’t work, in my experience), I also said we should slow it down. Go to therapy. Keep in touch. She refused. The only thing I asked was that she not serve me papers at work. I was new, and I was the department head, and my team didn’t need to see me get served at work.

So she served me at work.

A couple of months later, I met an amazing woman. I knew it was risky, but we decided to date. She’s fantastic. She enjoys all the things I do (travel, cooking, wine – all things my wife was lukewarm – at best – about), my friends love her, and she matches my hustle professionally.

And then, almost six months after leaving, my wife decided that she wanted to work things out.

I’m just not sure we can put the toothpaste back in the tube, so-to-speak. I love her endlessly, but I know I would wake up every day wondering if she’d leave again. There are some major issues with her emotionally. She’s controlling. She’s much less mature than me. But a piece of me still feels like, because she’s my wife for at least three more weeks, I should fight for this.