“My wife caught me snooping through her phone, but I have a legitimate reason to do so”

I need some advice. The last time my wife changed the password on her phone, I found out she was talking to one of her exes, and she tried hooking up with him. It was quickly foiled when I confronted her about it, and the issue was resolved. She hasn’t spoken to him since. HOWEVER, I recently noticed she changed her password again.

I got caught trying to snoop, and she FLIPPED OUT. She threatened to divorce me and kick me out of the house. My question is, was I justified in thinking something wasn’t right and checking up on her?

The way she reacted was a huge red flag to me, and she is extremely protective over her phone. Always has been. Even though she has free access to my phone at any given moment, knows my passwords, etc., I don’t know any of hers, and she gets mad if I even glance at her phone. She even refuses to give me the password to our cell phone account, which we share. How do I resolve this conflict?

2 thoughts on ““My wife caught me snooping through her phone, but I have a legitimate reason to do so”

  1. Somebody says:

    She doesn’t seem to have much respect for you. I hate to suggest this, but she’s looking to cheat and obviously isn’t going to stop, and I think you should find someone else, unless you’re into the idea of an open relationship – and I’m not getting the impression that you are.

  2. therapyinsdcom says:

    I’m sorry to hear about the conflict with your wife…infidelity in a marriage, emotional or physical, happens more often than not. Considering your history together, it is reasonable that you are questioning her. It’s only fair that after a breach in trust it takes time to rebuild.

    You asked about resolving the issue. That said have you prepared yourself for ‘worst case scenario’? What do you plan on doing if you had the information you want from her? It’s good to think ahead before moving forward- as it sounds you may have a lot to deal with whatever direction it goes.

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