“It hurts to think that I’m not good enough for him”

I don’t know what to do anymore. My boyfriend won’t propose to me, and we’ve been together for over a year. I am currently 5 months pregnant with his child, and even then it seems he doesn’t want to. He is 31, and I am 25. He and I are both divorced; however, he proposed and married his ex within 1 year of being with her, even though she didn’t have his child.

Apparently it ended badly though. Anyways, I am heartbroken, and it gets worse when he mentions how marriage is “just a paper.” He says he wants to marry me someday…but I don’t know when :/ He also goes out a lot on his free time and drinks/smokes medicinal weed, which I am not a huge fan of. I am two weeks away from graduating with my bachelor of science in criminal justice and then heading to law school. I’m an honor student and have a promising future. It just hurts to think that sometimes I may just not be good enough for this man. Whatever happens, my child will always be my first and only priority. Any advice on this situation would be greatly appreciated.

2 thoughts on ““It hurts to think that I’m not good enough for him”

  1. yeahbutwhatif says:

    Let him figure it out. It’s not that you’re not good enough for him, but he is clearly not manning up to his situation. You’re pregnant and he is spending his free time getting drunk and getting high, meaning he is either avoiding dealing with things or can’t. Either way, you need to find out which so I would give him space, don’t push him on it and don’t chase after him. He either needs to be in or out, you need to know which so you know what part he is playing in it. You’re right that your first priority is your child but keep in mind that you can’t take care of your child without taking care of yourself first. Don’t put yourself in a bad position as that will just make it harder to do so. Congratulations on your pregnancy too, it’s an amazing life changing and ultimately incredibly rewarding part of life

  2. Anonymous says:

    You are about to be a mom. This man isn’t good enough for you or your child. Do you want your baby to grow up to be like him? I sure hope not. Don’t teach your child that this is ok. You are strong enough to get through this. Move in with family if you need to. Set up child support payments and move on. I know it hurts now. I know it sucks you hooked up with a over grown child instead of a partner, but you can and need to fix this. It won’t be easier staying with him. All the childcare is going to be on you. Eventually everything will be on you since he’s using downers (alcohol and weed) which means he’ll quit working. There isn’t a thing you can do to fix him or making him want to.

    To change this situation you must put the ball in motion. Do it today and leave. You can make you and that baby’s life better. It won’t happen staying with this man. You have a great future ahead of you with those degrees. Good luck new mama! You can do this! I believe in you!

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