I’ve just received some disturbing news from my estranged brother who lives with my boyfriend of two years; he told me that my boyfriend had been seeing one of his friends on the side for the past 18 months. He seemed so earnest when he told me, so I spoke directly to my boyfriend. (On a side note my brother and boyfriend have been growing apart for the past year now and barely stand each other anymore).
He said it was stupid and that it was complete bullshit, and he too looked so earnest and hurt about the accusations and I do trust him. I honestly don’t know who to believe because I trust both of them and they both looked and sounded so earnest. We’ve been together for two years and I’ve invested so much into this relationship that I don’t want to lose it.
My confession is that I want to ask my boyfriend to look through his phone, just to settle my paranoia. Even though I trust him wholeheartedly, I can’t stop thinking ‘what if’ and it’s eating me inside. But I don’t know how to ask without destroying everything in the process. But if I don’t ask, it’s going to destroy me.