What should I do?

Ok I’m 14 years old and I think… Well I know I’m in love with this girl who is my same age. I’ve liked her since the 7th grade but I just recently realized my love for her. I’ve known her since the first grade and our parents are pretty good friends. In fact, I’ve been to her house for dinner a few times with my family. We’re not like the best of friends but we do talk. It’s usually just sharing stories and it’s not very frequent. I think she would consider me her friend but I’m not sure. I’ve made an effort to talk to her more lately but I don’t have her number. My friends make fun of me for liking her because she has small breasts/butt but I see past that. They pressure me and push me to ask her out but I feel like we’re not even good enough friends yet. Most of the people I know know that I like her. What should be my next step in getting to know her better, and then what should I do?

One thought on “What should I do?

  1. missmaria says:

    [Firstly good for you for wanting to get to know her properly first. It’s definitely a good foundation to build a friendship and there’s nothing wrong in taking it slow and just talking. I wish there were boys like you when I was in school. I was awkward and shy and known as a “church mouse”. Talking to boys made me uneasy because they were less about talking and more about groping and kissing in the dark corner of the local Disco. Yes, I said Disco because thats what us cool kids of the UK got up to.

    Secondly, please pay no attention to your friends. Unless they can be helpful to your cause or cease taking girls at face value – just put the ear plugs in! It’s wonderful of you to see past someone’s flaws, and again, I wish someone saw past my braces, acne and poor makeup application skills. If you really don’t feel comfortable in asking her out then don’t. Don’t worry that:”oh if I don’t ask her out now, someone else will”. As you said, you don’t feel you both know each other that well yet. Of course thats what dates are for but I’ve entered into pretty good relationships when I was friends with the person first, the most successful being my husband where we talked for hours, days and months about everything before realising “hey, we really like each other!”

    So to get to know her better…You say that you’ve been over her house a few times and both your parents are good friends, that seems like a good foundation to maybe drop by and say:”Do you fancy beating me at the bowling alley? How about stuffing our faces at DQ? Going for a walk etc” Even a phone call. Anywhere that is not in the vicinity of your friends.

    I’ll also add that I neither dislike your friends, hate the sound of them or think you ditch them entirely. As I and my male friends have learned on the path to adulthood, we can say and think some crazy things. I grew up with superficial boys and even I was guilty of putting materialistic wants when asked what my dream guy was (had to look like Newsies-era Christian Bale). Choosing girls with nice butts and big breasts won’t last as a “want” and as you and your friends get older, you’ll realise that there are deeper traits to be desired in someone. In fact, it makes me giggle at my teenage years. Them making fun of you is just that old chestnut called “insecurity”. How many of them have such a good friendship with a girl as you do? Chances are, they’re jealous.

    So mister, you go forth and continue being that guy who looks for building great friendships, go as far as you feel comfortable, talk, hang out and soon you’ll reach a point where you’ll be ready to ask her out on a date if you so wish.

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