Once upon a time I had a friend who constantly got into all kinds of scrapes (usually involving money, sometimes school crap). Every time we got together it was always about figuring out the problem and getting out of trouble. It was actually pretty fun sometimes because it gave us stories we could tell later (e.g. remember that time we had no money for rent and then figured out we could get extra funding, but the paperwork was due yesterday so we had to bluff our way through a meeting with a financial officer, pretending the whole time like we’d already submitted the paperwork weeks ago and never heard back?)
Like I said though, this was fun only sometimes and it pretty much was the relationship. If there wasn’t a conflict, there wasn’t much talking or sharing going on. Plus it was kind of exhausting. Eventually, the friendship just ended, abruptly. We finished school and I just couldn’t afford the time/money/effort on problems that could have easily been avoided in the first place. That’s probably part of what growing up is about, but I could be wrong.
What are your thoughts? Do you have this kind of relationship right now? Is this even a relationship or some kind of sick game between two sick people? I’m just curious to know how unique or common this kind of relationship is.
LemonVibe 
[These kinds of relationships just sound like people who have nothing better to do with their time than jump off the roof into a pool, or who wait until three hours before a paper is due and then try to scramble to write it. There’s no substance to a friendship like that, so to me it’s not really a friendship. It’s more like two people who just have this hobby of being irresponsible together.
Also, and this may just be the women’s college talking, it seems like an extension of a pissing contest to me. Like, who can hold out longer, who can come up with the craziest solution to a problem, who can get into the biggest problem in the first place…
[Speaking as an evolutionary biologist, your friendship sounds very… well, evolutionary. Popular theories hold that primitive males evolved to hunt together, that these types of coordinated activities were what bonded men together, and that these instincts still stay with us today. You and your friend would seem to fit that premise perfectly….
[I think you nailed it yourself: “That’s what growing up is all about.”
You find there are too many genuine problems knocking at your door without having to go looking for more!
[I haven’t had this kind of relationship, so I can’t relate. I can see how it would be fun, but there probably isn’t much substance behind it. It seems like the type of friendship you’d see in movies!
[Probably should have mentioned this friend was female.
[Some people just thrive on drama, and these types of relationships are built of those people. I’ve had a few of these kinds of friendships – where every get together was filled with stress, drama, and “woe is me” diatribes. These people are always the victims of whatever they believe has been set against them in life. I think by definition, these ARE indeed relationships and not sick games. It’s a form of codependency.
[Some people thrive on drama. It seems like this might have been the type of friend you had. While it can be invigorating to solve the world’s problems and come out the hero(or solving the rent problem and coming out with a roof over your head), it can get old. How many times do you want to relive the same scenario, on a different day? I have had friends like that and I grew out of them, as I feel you have grown out of your friend. For a while, you want to help your friend, but then it gets old. I think it is common to have a relationship like the one you had, but it’s not common to remain in them for long!!