I am feeling a little lost. I have recently come back from traveling around the world after two and a half years. A large part of me traveling was the fact that I was in a job I didn’t want to do anymore, and my dad having terminal cancer made me realize how short life was. The glimpse of tranquility and calmness I saw on his face really made me want to feel the “sense of freedom” he felt from packing his bags with little money.
I went traveling and loved it. I studied photography — a subject I had huge drive and passion for. During this time, my then-boyfriend moved in with me, and it all went down hill from there. I made my life about making sure he was happy, stopped doing things for myself, and to be honest, just felt as if I was no good at photography. Instead of learning the things that I didn’t understand, I simply saw every failure as me being a failure, and in the end, the guy I thought was going to be with me forever left me. I do not want to blame him or anyone else for my failures, and I know that we just weren’t suited. Continue reading