I have been in my relationship for almost 5 years. We have 2 daughters, 2 and 3. We have been engaged for almost 3 years. He cancelled the venue & plans for the wedding about 4 months after he proposed. Said that we needed to work on our relationship before we made it legal, he has been married once before, so he is reserved.

Now, he says we are already married, that when we consummated, we were married. He has very different points of view. We have never taken vows or are legally married, but he insists that we are. He is constantly sharing his ideas with me, points of view on a variety of subjects but when I don’t agree, he says I am wrong and says I should think as he thinks.

On the surface, we are great together, we joke & laugh regularly & I love the family we have together. But any time we speak about important subjects like core values and beliefs, we disagree every time. And he says I am wrong, that it’s all me. That I need to take a look at myself and make some changes. But he isn’t willing to see my point of view, I’m just wrong. I asked if he would be willing to go to counseling with me, he refused.

I feel exhausted all the time. I am filled with anxiety at every moment, and I always have this knot in my stomach. He said to me a couple weeks ago, “it’s your job to make my dick hard, not my life”. That was a slap in the face & I haven’t been the same since, but he saw NO WRONG in it, said I perceived it wrong. I don’t know what to think anymore. I just wanted to share. I’m so lost.