“Is she interested in me?”

I’m 26m, independent person, met a girl introduced by a mutual friend. Hit it off quite well, she’s independent too, about my age.

Asked her out for some desserts and coffee and she said yes. Texted very little because I prefer to see her and not be a text buddy (I found that I always initiated first). Offered her to pick her up, but she prefers to meet at the place, so we met at the place and hit it off really well. We talked for almost 4 hours effortlessly, didn’t felt like it was that long, she had to go cause she had a family dinner and I offered to walk her to her car. She initiated text by saying she reached home and had a good time.

During the date, she showed signs like playing with her hair and sharing some very deep personal stuff talking about her life on top of the casual stuff we talked about having fun.

I maintain texting her, initiating every about 2 days and she replied rather quickly, and there was teasing and I threw a bit of sexual double meanings to indirectly let her know that I want her and not to be a friend and she played along with me.

After about a week, I decided to ask her again if she would like to tag along for my morning run and cycling (we were both marathoners and triathletes) and she declined with the reason of having made plans already with to do some dress measuremeants for her bridesmaid dress. I did ask her what about Sunday and she said she had to do some grocery shopping and offered to meet on Saturday after her dress thing. I agreed, and told her I can accompany her if she didn’t mind and she said she will be with her friend, the bride herself. Asked if she wanted to catch a movie after our coffee, she said she had family dinner, offered to pick her up, she said she’ll be out whole morning that we will meet at the place.

So it was set. And 2 days before, she canceled on me saying she had to help her friend for some wedding photo shoot on that Saturday. She didn’t reschedule. I told her it’s okay and next coffee is on her.

Based on my understanding, if she cancels and doesn’t reschedule, she’s not interested. If she is, she will make an effort to meet up. I refrained from initiating text with her for about 5 days and there was no talk at all.

I had second thoughts because she was a girl I really liked and very different from the other girls I dated, so I give it a second chance and chat her up again. As usual, she continues the conversation and I asked her if she had plans on Friday night and I would like to take her out on a date. She said she made plans with her friends already to go hiking. So I just said it’s okay and told her to have a great time. I left it as that. It has been 1 day now since this.

Now, my mind is thinking she denied a second date twice without offering or making an effort to reschedule or re-initiate. To me she’s not interested but the back of my mind, she’s ticking all signs that she is interested other than the “accidental touching” and the “rescheduling/re-initiate if she canceled a date”. There is a benefit of the doubt because she is a bit of a introverted/conservative person.

Right now, the second date canceled without rescheduling was my cue to move on to other girls I’m dating. I’ll be ignoring her until she decides to re-initiate or never haha. Don’t get me wrong though, but I really do like this girl and she ticks almost all my expectations of a lover.

So… after this wall of text, what do you guys think of the situation I’m in, and is what I’m doing/planning to do a good way to deal with this?

One thought on ““Is she interested in me?”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Stop playing mind games with texting for one. People in love don’t take score with who texted whom and who initiated. That’s something high school kids do and only the ones who are constant drama.

    Also I guess you’ve never had to deal with a wedding. That takes over your life the closer it gets. She’s probably being honest with you.

    Try making plans two weeks in advance or more.

    Or just tell her. Like a adult who wants to date someone who doesn’t play games by texting every two days and counting who initiated what. Hell if you were doing that in a marriage you would be on your way to divorce.

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