how can I resolve this situation and get over the anger and sadness I feel?

Me and my partner have been living together for 6 years. I have always worked full time and up until recently my partner has not worked. Whilst he wasn’t working he did all of the household chores and made dinner etc. We had hundreds of conversations about our finances and I told my partner on hundreds of occasions that if I am going to be the only working I would like the opportunity to go to college or uni so I could at least get a job that pays enough for me to keep us both. I’d also like to mention that I absolutly hate my current job to the point that I’m depressed. My partner has continually told me to hang in there and stick it out because he plans on joining the police and at this point I could quit my job or go part time and possibly have a baby. Now, last week he started a 15 hour a week job which obviously doesn’t bring in much money and I don’t think he has any intention of ever doing more. I’m so angry because I was fully prepared to keep him as long as I was able to get a degree. But now I’ve wasted so much time based on his false promise. I feel like he could have been honest with me and took a full time job for a little while so that I could get my degree. Instead im now stuck working fulll time in a job I can’t stand in order to pay the bills and not much time to work on my degree whilst he works 15 hours a week. Why didn’t he give me the opportunity is it so much to ask for what I was willing to give in return?

2 thoughts on “how can I resolve this situation and get over the anger and sadness I feel?

  1. Dennis Hong says:

    [I feel like you’re asking the wrong question here. It sounds like you and your partner had a comfortable arrangement… for him. And given that you were okay living off his promises for six years, well, I’m not sure what motivation you’re giving him — or have ever given him — to get a job.

    Ultimately, it sounds like you’re with someone who just isn’t very ambitious. And that’s not something you can change about someone.

    As such, the question I think you have to ask yourself isn’t, “Why hasn’t he given you an opportunity to pursue your own dreams,” but rather, “How much longer are you willing to put up with his empty promises?”

  2. resullins says:

    [I agree with Dennis. This guy is taking full advantage of being a mooch. And you’re letting him. He obviously doesn’t have any intention of helping you advance at all.

    I would get out. Just leave. Go make your own way. Even if this guy did become a cop, that’s a lot of training, and pretty low pay for a while until he moves up in tenure a little bit.

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