is my boyfriend an asshole? am i doing something wrong or os it him in the wrong?

Ok so i met this guy on facebook about a month and a half ago he is a lil older than i am there is a 6 year difference so he sees me as young he has on occasion said you make me feel old, anyhow on the first night we clicked instantly and he looked to be the perfect guy however as tine has passed he has his moods( we still havent met in person) everytime we set up a day to meet up he doesnt text me until late into the day and says he over slept or he had family problems. And i have forgiven him everytime i will admiy we have exchanged intimate videos and picturesbut i kinda felt forced into it we were on the phone obe night and he asked me why dont we ever talk about sex and i replied to him saying i didnt know you wanted to then he went on to bombard me with comme.ts like well everytime i try to get the converaation there you tfy to change the subject so i think your either not interested in me or your cheating or you just dont want to think of me like that but afterwards he showers me with comments like your sexy your beautiful my georgeous girl my babygirl then i will somehow do something to make bim angry and he starts fighting again and our fights are always one sided because if i try to fight back he will call me stupid or a bitch or dumb cunt or a whore and he will make racist remarks about the people i go to school with and say im a whore for being around guys all day not that i want to be around them its just my school is co ed but then he wil apologize for calling me stupid but not for any of the other things he said he refuses to come meet my dad vecause i may be grown but i still live under my fathers roof so he says he hates my dad and calls him names and says if he meets him he will end up going to prison for attempted murder if i dont grasp what he is sayibg inttelectualy he will tell me to shut up if i but felt ki.da forced into it we were on the phone one night and he said to me why dobt you

9 thoughts on “is my boyfriend an asshole? am i doing something wrong or os it him in the wrong?

  1. EricaSwagger says:


    First of all you don’t have a boyfriend, you have an internet crush.
    Secondly, why do you like this guy? He treats you like garbage.

    Please understand that when a guy goes back and forth between telling you you’re beautiful and sexy, and calling you a dumb cunt, he’s manipulating you. He gets to treat you like shit (THIS is his true character) and keep you around just by saying “nice” things here and there. You’re letting this happen. His behavior is actually a classic sign of psychopathy (meaning, a person that enjoys harming others).

    Get out and get out now. Sever all ties (that means, like, totally stop talking to him, delete all phone numbers and block him on every social media account).
    He’s BAD NEWS.

    And see if you can get a teacher at school to tutor you in grammar or writing or something.

  2. Dennis Hong says:

    [Yeah, this blurb disturbs me on several levels. To be blunt, I think this is something you really need to seek professional counseling for. There’s only so much strangers in an online forum can say or do. Ultimately, only you can decide if you want to break free from this situation.

  3. Joanna says:

    [Sometimes there’s a reason single people are single. They don’t treat others well. I’d cut this guy off and find someone new (and friendly) to talk to.

  4. Matt Sanchelli says:

    [End this thing now.

    You don’t need this guy in your life, and if you think you do then I would highly recommend looking into the advice that Dennis recommended above.

    This isn’t a relationship. He isn’t your boyfriend. He’s some stranger you met online. I wouldn’t let my best friend talk to me the way this guy has. It’s abuse.

    For whatever reasons you’ve justified making yourself think you want/need to be with this guy; YOU ARE WRONG. No small moment of being nice. No small moment of seemingly being a decent guy is going to make up for that way he’s already treating someone he hasn’t even met.

    Like Erica said, it’s manipulation. Him making comments about your being younger making him feel old and just one small method for him to try and make you feel guilty. I wouldn’t be surprised if during your arguments that when you try to call him out on something he legitimately was in the wrong for he turned the tables and ended up making it come off like you were the bad guy.

    Stop this right now. Nothing good is going to come of it.

  5. Missy says:

    [yes. from what you describe, your boyfriend is an asshole. and not a small one, either. i really hope that you take the advice of all of the people above. no one deserves to be treated the way this guy is treating you. matt and erica are right – he is manipulating and abusing you.

    please find someone you can trust to talk to about this. you deserve so much better.

    • Dan says:

      [I don’t have any new advice from what’s been said. I just want to reinforce what you’re hearing. Get out now and never contact him again.

  6. Lynnda says:

    [My husband is 5 years older than me. We have been together since I was 23. If he ever spoke (or typed) to me in that way – it would be the end. His/our age has nothing to do with it – this dude is an asshole and if you think that it’s okay for him to speak to you this way then you absolutely need some therapy.

    Cut his a$$ off.. No ultimatums.. no requests to work it out. People are at their BEST when they first meet. If this is his best I wouldn’t want to be within 100 miles of him when he starts showing his true colors.

  7. kerplunkLYN says:

    [Cut off all contact & just thank your lucky stars he never DID agree to meet you in person!

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