Break up help

I had been dating the most amazing man. We had so much in common and spent a lot of time together – typically 4 out of 7 nights with a lot of texting and talking when we weren’t together. This week out if nowhere he says he’s going to try to get back together with his ex-wife after being divorced for 5 years after she cheated on him. They have a 6 year old together. I feel totally blindsided and hurt by this. We had plans for this weekend and last week he was making future plans with me.
Why would he give up a good relationship for someone who did that to him? Of course he says he wants to be friends-should I try to do that? I’m so sad and confused and hurt. Any advice?

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3 thoughts on “Break up help

  1. Dennis Hong says:

    [You didn’t say how long you were dating this guy, but unfortunately, I don’t think it matters. Because ultimately, he’s going to have a lot more history with his ex-wife than with you. So, I think you have to accept that it’s over.

    And… god no. Do NOT be friends with him. That will only make it 100 times harder for you to move on.

  2. yomar says:

    [The fact that he is going back with someone who has cheated on him means that he is still in-love with his ex-wife. The best way to this is let him go and move on with your life. Yes, you may get hurt and though I am not on any position to say how much it hurts and how long will the pain remain, I can honestly say that in time, you will get healed.

    Also, there is nothing wrong with becoming friends again. However, you need to keep your distance and communication away from him while you are still trying to heal. Updates and chats with him won’t help.

    I fell for you, I know it hurts. Forgive him and move on.

  3. New User 721769 says:

    [Thanks for the advice. I guess I know you are both right that I can’t compete with his ex-wife and that I know it’s over. Maybe he wasn’t as happy as he seemed to be. And I know that I shouldn’t be friends with him, but sometimes it’s good to hear things from an unbiased third party.
    Any advice on how to get myself to stop thinking and over analyzing everything?

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