I’m a woman who’s been single for the past few years. Up until a few weeks ago, I’ve had very little luck in finding a guy that I was interested in. But then a work friend of mine (A) set me up with a friend of hers (R) that had recently moved to the area. We’ve only been on a couple, casual dates, but we REALLY hit it off and had a great time together. As cheesy as it sounds, I felt like we really connected on the dates.
So another guy that I work with (T) is a friend of A’s and mine, and is from the same town that A grew up in. Because of this, T used to be friends with R back in high school. A couple days ago the three of us (T, A, and me) were out drinking when T said that R had a micropenis. A and I kind of laughed it off at first because we assumed he was joking, but he assured us that he was serious. So then I thought that maybe he was just over exaggerating when he said micropenis, but T was adamant that he was telling the truth.
The rest of the night was kind of awkward and I was kind of upset with T for being catty and bringing it up, but the more I think about it the more I don’t know what to do. I feel vain caring about it, like I’m some bitch who only cares about penis size. But I feel like sexual satisfaction is an important part of any relationship, and if T IS telling the truth I’m not sure how happy I could be in the relationship.
I guess I’m just kind of confused about what I should do. I’m in my early thirties, so I really want to settle down and I don’t want to wait too long to have kids. But I’m not even sure if he can have kids, and I’m not sure I’d want to continue a relationship where it seems I’m going to meet a dead end.
But how would I even bring this up? It seems incredibly tacky to just ask him about it. I don’t even know how to handle the situation, or what I should do or say in order to find out the details that I want to know. Does it make me a huge, vain bitch for turning down an awesome guy over something like this?
LemonVibe 
[Hmm. I don’t know. If you know it’s a dealbreaker, I would just wait and see and if it is true then just chalk it up to ‘incompatibility’ and let him down lightly. I figure that if it IS true, this is not something that R will reveal in the heat of the moment. He’ll probably tell you beforehand without prompting since I’m sure it would be something that most men would be aware is surprising to their potential partners. I think you should give him a chance since you seemed to hit it off with him so well.
[Um, feel it out…? But seriously, I would drop it and let things take their course. I promise you that there is no way for you to bring it up with R without it being (a) extremely awkward, and (b) needlessly hurting him.
If you’re having a great time, keep seeing him, and when/if you guys get intimate, see how it goes. Assuming that T has not had a sexual encounter with R, he might have no idea,, since, you know….some guys are grow-ers, not show-ers.
[So basically, you got too much T and A, when what you probably need is more R….
[Give him a chance now. And don’t feel bad if you want to drop out later. That would be a dealbreaker for most women.
[What if he’s really good sexually otherwise? What if he’s awesome at oral? What if it isn’t THAT small? I know this sounds like I’m joking but I’m not. He could be awesome at sex. He probably has to work extra hard because there are people going around telling his dates about his tiny doodle.
Give this man’s penis a fighting chance at least.
[Let’s look at it this way. There is something about you that is probably undesirable, right? How would YOU feel if this guy dumped you because he heard about it from someone else? And he didn’t even give you a CHANCE?
I would let what this person said about your guy go. Let things run their course. You will find out soon enough if things will work out or not. Don’t drop a good guy because of what someone else said.
[Being a guy, I cannot rule this out as a potential joke that probably originated back in High School, mostly because I couldn’t tell you ANYTHING about the penis size of any of my friends (and yes, I’m damn proud of that and hope that the streak never gets broken). Don’t give it a second thought; it’s a thing guys do to each other. R & T are probably laughing their butts off about it over a beer right now.
As far as getting pregnant down the road, I assure you: “It’s not the size of a penis, it’s what’s inside it that matters” 🙂
Now go have a great relationship!
[Is micropenis an official medical description of some sort? Or just a cruel way of saying he’s small? As Dave Jag says, sounds like a a joke between the guys.
[Seriously? You would dump this guy without knowing first hand if you were comparable sexually when you know you click with him? That’s not superficial, that’s just stupid. Sounds to me like you may be lookin for an excuse to end something that could be good for you. What are you afraid of? Being happy??
And no matter the penis size, children are no garuntee- would you want some guy to end it because he heard your eggs may be cracked?
[Dear Prudence had a column about this last year! Apparently… We ladies actually can adjust to a, um, smaller tool and eventually be just as satisfied as we were with Dennis’s Magnum Temple of Phallus. The vulva actually shrinks within a structure of a ltr and repeated monogamous exposure.
Studies show that guys with so-called micro-penises never ever cheat on their partners! So there’s that. DavidisGreat and Missy are probably/possibly right- he’s probably fantastic in bed and possibly a GROWER.
I’m sure you’ve heard about women’s spectrum of sexuality? Give this guy a chance. And buy a good vibrator and show him how it turns on.
[Little peen guys need love too!
[Lets be real here. Most likely, you are going to ask him and his response is going to be “naw T is just a dick. he was messing with you”. If you want to know just ask. No point in beating around the bush.
[I agree – give him a chance. There’s no way of knowing how accurate T’s description of R’s penis is. Or why he even is privy to that information (if it’s even true) in the first place!
Clicking with people the way you describe doesn’t happen that often. See where it goes, be patient, and don’t underestimate him.
[I really want an update to this one, please!
[I think T is just joking and R truly has a giant shlong or something.
[Can we please have an update…? Pretty-please?