A recent blurb got me thinking…
What are the recurring issues you have with your significant other? I figure every relationship has them, but I’d like to know which ones are important, which ones you’ve given up on, and which ones you have no idea what to do about?
For example, Q and I used to always get into it about communication. He’s really bad about calling me and letting me know he’s staying out later than planned with the boys. That’s one I’ve given up on. I used to be really insecure, but then one day I realized that I trusted him and that I knew where he was. So it was no big deal.
One that still gets me is his overall tidiness. He doesn’t pick up after himself… he leaves socks in the recliner, beer bottles on the window ledge, boxers behind the bathroom door, etc. I’ve finally gotten him to rinse his dishes instead of leaving them to fester… but I still harp on him about the house.
So what are the issues in your relationship? And what do you do about them?
LemonVibe 
[My boyfriend tends to back out of going to social events with me. This starts to get to me because I feel like it looks bad if he keeps on not going to things, and people ask where he is. He’s definitely a homebody and is hardly ever out with the guys, so at least that’s not an issue with us. Also, in terms of suggesting things to do, it’s about 80/20 me/him. I’m the one who usually comes up with activities to do or suggests going out to eat.
[Mine is always that I’m unable to convince people I care.
My “hill” so to speak is when whomever I’m in a relationship with, isn’t able to understand that it’s not in my nature to to be overly serious, or make plans for the future.
I’m a live for the moment kind of guy, someone who wants to make tons of plans or hang out all the time always clashes with me. I’ve always tried to solve it with stupid acts of affection to show that although I’m not the most romantic, or traditional guy, I do genuinely care.
Sadly though, these have a tendency to fall flat. For example for a girls birthday a few years ago I made her a macaroni card, complete with glue and glitter with some of those love hearts sweets thrown in for good measure. She wasn’t impressed at all, despite the fact it took me all night to make.
I guess there’s not too much I can do about that in the future except make it very clear what I’m like when I meet someone. Or buy better Macaroni, I’m not sure yet.
[Ooh, yeah, food. That’s always been a big hill for me. I’m somewhat of a carnivore, but for whatever reason, I almost always seem to end up dating vegetarians, “pescatarians,” or otherwise women who just don’t eat much red meat (or maybe that’s just a California thing).
Anyway, my greatest discovery was that really upscale steakhouses here in California almost always have a lovely vegetarian dish. Perfect excuse to skip the cheapo meat places and only go to nice steakhouses.
[Our biggest problem is what we’re having for dinner each night. Seriously, it’s the old “I don’t know, what do you want?” “Whatever you want.” “I don’t care, whatever you want.”
It’s pretty damn irritating.
[One issue I have with my hubby is that I try very hard to approach things calmly and rationally instead of just blowing up(this can be very hard, btw), and he tends to take it personally and get upset. So, then I end up not wanting to talk about things that are bothering me in an effort to not upset him. Obvioulsy, this doesn’t work out very well for our communication. We are making efforts to be more open and accepting of each others’ feelings, but it can be hard to not get upset in the heat of the moment. Communication is something that you can always get better at!!