Hello all,

So, about a year ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years as he was not helpful and in fact very self involved after my brother died. For a couple of months after he would message me sporadically to which I would either not reply or be off with him (in my eyes this ‘offness’ was warranted as the messages were very self-involved and about how HE was, when I was dealing with my brothers death). Anyway, he finally got the hint and stopped messaging.

However, for the past couple of months I’ve really missed him and can’t stop thinking about him. Things constantly remind me of things we did/liked/said etc. I’m not naïve and I have realised that this more or less began when he seemed to start seeing someone else. I know I am probably just jealous and just want him to want me instead of her but I am confused and scared that soon I will message him or something, especially if I drink. I cracked a couple of months ago and messaged him with some photos I had of him after getting a roll of film developed. He replied that he didn’t really know what to say and that he wasn’t ready to be friends just yet. I thought that this would placate me (not ready to be friends yet = not over me yet, right?!) but I’m now doubting that reasoning and thinking about it more.

I should probably point out that I currently have a boyfriend who I started seeing a couple of months after breaking up with the ex. I know I sound really jealous, selfish and horrible (and I’m sorry this is so long and rambly) but I think I just wanted to get this out and see what other people say. There is probably a lot more to this but I just can’t think how to put it down in writing. Thanks.