“I didn’t get much out of our hookup”

I met this guy in a dating app and we had good conversations, so we decided to hang out. I went to his place, we watched a show, cuddled, and later messed around a little bit. Lets just say that it was better for him than it was for me, which is fine. I decided not to stay the night.

The next morning I texted to see if he wanted to hang out again, but he said he didn’t think I would want to, because basically I didn’t get much out of our hookup (due to malfunctions on his end). I said that I didn’t mind because sometimes it’s just awkward the first time with someone. I’ve texted a few times since then but there’s been no reply. What’s up with this? Was it just a hookup?

“The women I date seem to think I only want a casual hookup”

Would definitely appreciate any insights you might have on the following dilemma!

As a bit of background, I’m a man in my late twenties, well educated, confident, and an all round good guy. I never had a whole lot of success with women as a younger man, but now that I I’m all grown up, I’ve been rather successful in courting, dating, and romancing women.

I do however have a very specific and seemingly unorthodox problem.

Conventional wisdom might suggest that expressions of physical intimacy are an indicator of a burgeoning relationship. However, on many occasions the more physically intimate I become with a woman I’m dating (over the course of the first few dates), the more reticence/resistance I encounter on subsequent dates when intimating or initiate intimacy.

If I can distill some of the feedback I’ve received from women, I get the impression that the ladies in question might sense a predictable ending to dates, and/or feel that the date was just a perfunctory prequel to intimacy, and/ or seem to be wanting something “more” on dates (whether that is more face time, more fun, or more of a connection, I don’t know), and/or that I just want to “hook up.” Continue reading