If any of you have ever been unsure about moving to a new city (at least a couple of hours away), but it worked out and you were so glad you moved, I’d like to hear about it. My only experience with moving more than a couple of hours away, aside from college, did not work out well and I moved away again after 4 months. Which is why I’m hesitant to do so again. However, if my job/social life/love life hasn’t improved by the time my lease is up next year at this time, I think I’m going to consider moving to shake things up. I also would hate to be far away from my family, so that’s something else I have in mind (right now I live 45 minutes from my parents and about an hour and a half from my grandfather/aunts/uncles/cousins).
Anyway, I’d just like to hear thoughts and advice about it as it’s something that recently popped into my head. I just don’t want to be stagnant forever if things aren’t going my way around here.
LemonVibe 
[This is interesting! I have moved a number of times…across the country/different states every time. It’s worked out great every time, however only twice have I moved completely by myself (the other two times I moved with friends and with my boyfriend at the time).
The solo moves are definitely tougher because it can be lonely at times and overwhelming to be starting over, but at the same time, there is something about being in a place you chose specifically. I tend to think that making big moves are very character building and can add a lot to your life. I moved a year ago and it’s been awesome at times and hard at times, but overall a very good experience.
I guess some things to think about are: what are your job prospects in a different city? how much would it cost you in terms of rent/travel/moving expenses to move? what type of criteria would you have for the place you would move? i.e., what kinds of things would you be looking for in a new place?
[I moved to the opposite side of the country on a whim at age 27, after I’d finished my MBA…. I hadn’t even been there and didn’t know anyone. Sometime during the 3-day drive, I logged into Craigslist and found an apartment.
It’s been the most liberating experience of my life! I’ve been here 2 years now, made friends, lost friends, dated, broke up, moved apartments, and am starting my second job. It’ll all work out 🙂
[Moving to a new place by yourself can be one of the most intimidating things you’ll ever do, but I think it’s ultimately worth it if you’re unhappy in your current situation. I did it last August, and I am so much happier now than I was before the move, even though I had a good job and support network at home.
Of course, you need to be able to afford the move and living expenses while you get there, but I think the most important thing is that you have a network of people to socialize with, or at least one family member or friend you can go spend holidays with—just something to use as an anchor when you need it. You don’t want too much though, because that’s the whole reason you’re moving: to start a new life.
If you do decide to move and don’t know a lot of people, Meetup.com is a good way to get to know people. But I guess meeting new people is a whole different topic of discussion.
[I moved halfway across the country after graduating college, and it was the best thing I could have done for myself. I’ve been here 8 years now, and it was really hard to start, but I have a life here and this is home now. I’m not gonna lie, living 12 hours away from my family sucks, and it means I miss a lot of important events, like funerals and weddings, but overall I’m happy here.
It’s always hard to get started in a new place and make friends. I second the recommendation for meetup.com, and I also recommend taking a class or something along those lines to make friends. If you want to make friends, you have to go out and find them!
[After college, my wife and I moved from the extreme NorthEast to the extreme SouthWest (Burlington, VT to San Diego, CA). A lot of culture shock at first, but I buried myself in my work to keep from noticing. San Diego was absolutely beautiful and there is no reason we couldn’t have stayed there (hence, a successful move.) BUT, after three years, we ultimately decided that we missed the “green-ness” of New England and all of the lakes, rivers, and forests and things we grew up with. Plus, all of our family was back East, so we felt we had a responsibility to be closer. We sort of compromised by moving 2-hours away from everyone, so we are still “on our own” in one sense, but “right next door” in another. No regrets for having tried it! You always learn alot about yourself when you decide to up and move, and there’s no shame in coming back — especially if you do it by choice!
[My girl and I moved from Nebraska to Florida somewhat recently. That was about a year ago and we’re still here.
I won’t sugar coat it for you, it can be rough. Not only are you leaving everything behind, but some of it follows you anyways! And not the good parts, such as friends and family… It’s different, getting used to how things work in a new state. It’s liberating and frustrating at the same time. As an example: When I went to license my car in FL, I had to pay an extra $250 just because I’d never been licensed in FL before!
My suggestion would be to make sure that you know what you’re getting into and then, after that, making sure you’ve got the funds to cover anything you’ve might have missed!
As I said before though, moving to a new area is quite liberating. You don’t have the drama or anything you had to deal with before. It’s kind of a clean slate!
I wish you the best of luck with it (if you go that route, of course), just make sure you cover your bases or you could get burned!
[Oh god… I used to move constantly. The last time was 4 years ago, when I moved to Nashville. I hated being in the Southwest, and wanted to get back to the South. It worked well… I met me bf, bought a house, and I’m close enough to my family to get to see them.
It was hard at first, making new friends, finding a place to live sight-unseen, getting involved, whatevs. But it’s also going to be exactly as good as you make it. If you go out and get involved, find hobbies, anything… you’re going to find your place.
[I’m the girl who has never moved. I can’t really imagine being far away from everything I know. The idea frightens me. However, I truly admire people who pick up and go. Then, you get to experience life and see new things, places and meet new people. So, if you are stuck where you are and you have nothing holding you back, I say move on. If one city isn’t for you then it is entirely possible that a new city could have what you are looking for. I say find where you are happy. For me, it was to stay here in San Diego. For others, it takes a few brave moves to find what they are looking for. Happy travels!!
[Hmm. I’ve only moved once, and then for college, so it’s not really quite the same. Just throwing my 2c in, I think it’s a great idea. One I’m considering myself. Basically, if you’re feeling stagnant and you’re just tired of where you’re living and have the funds, why not? All my friends that have moved around are very happy with their moves. The ones that seem to be more in a funk are the ones that moved home after college (probably because of that “I’m back home but everyone’s moved on” feeling.)
I say, go for it!
[I love moving to a new city- but I have discovered I can always do what I love pretty much anywhere. If you do move, a trick I use is to give myself at Least a year- don’t move as soon as things get hard: you have to give your new city a chance and that takes time.
[I hope it’s not too late to add my two-cents (who would have thought I would have less time to write/post during work travel).
I have made a couple “large” moves in my life and both times they have definitely worked in my favor.
After graduating college (I was just about to turn 23); I moved to Los Angeles. I had no job prospects, just a place to live and money I had saved working 2 jobs for the last 6 months.
The first couple of months were difficult as I spent most of my time looking for work, working out in my apartment gym and helping my roommate with his senior film. Fortunately that last item allowed me to meet a lot of interesting people and I made a couple friends that helped distract me from the frustrations that my job search was moving at a snail’s pace.
Fortune shone down on me about 2 months after moving and I landed a paid internship in the field I wanted to work in. The work was incredible and the opportunities for a recent college grad could not be beat. After about a year there I needed to find better paying work and somehow fell into a job that I still consider the best job I’ve ever had…and I was in that job for nearly 3 years.
Four years in LA and I decided I had done what I wanted to do and moved to be closer to family.
Again, a giant life changing move that I have not regretted once. Because of that move I’ve discovered different avenues I had never really considered before (particularly writing and dispensing advice in places like LemonVibe).
About 18 months ago I was feeling a bit “lost” (perhaps similar to you when you state things may be becoming stagnant)…and I was considering moving again if some things didn’t begin to make a change.
Fortunately, I didn’t have to move again. Had I moved again, or had I not realized the “fortune” I have where I’m currently living I would not have met my current girlfriend; whom I am certain if the love of my life.
So, my advice to you may/may not be helpful. When it comes to big moves like this sometimes you just have to take the leap (such as my move to LA); but sometimes you have make a calculated decision (such as when I left LA)….
They all will lead you to the choices I are “meant” to come to. I don’t believe there is really a right or wrong answer when it comes to whether you decide to shake things up or not…it’s just a different set of options and circumstances. From there it depends on how to decide to deal with them, how you accept them or how you reject them.
I say if things haven’t changed to your liking by the time your lease it up….don’t be afraid to make a big move. Don’t let the past jade you on the idea. You can’t have good adventure stories if you never go on the adventure.
[I guess it depends on what you mean by working out. I have moved from Nebraska to San Francisco to London to Chicago. In each I’ve found love and lost it. Learned more about myself and life in general. Experienced things I never would have else where. Same with meeting people. For me, they all worked out.
The first year in a new place will be the most difficult. So always give it longer to find your footing.