I don’t know if this site is limited to just relationships or if you can discuss family relationships as well, so sorry if this is out of line.
I grew up in an emotionally abusive environment. My wants and needs were never as important as what my mother and father wanted for me. I wanted to be a writer, but that didn’t matter “You need a job that is high paying. Screw writing. You should be an engineer,” my mother would always say.
Any time I screwed up, even the smallest thing, I was called “fucking stupid,” and “worthless.” They took all of my flaws and focused on them all the time, and said things like “You’ll never be as successful as your brother will,” or “I don’t know why we even had you.”
Fast forward to today, and I’m twenty and still living in their house. Why? Because they’ve made it impossible to leave. Until I’m 24, I cannot file as independent when asking for financial aid for college, so I have to say I have my parent’s income. BUT they refuse to help out at all, so I can’t get enough aid to afford it.
I can’t get a job and move out either because I don’t have a car. To buy one, I’d need a job, but they refuse to transport me to any job that I get. And I can’t walk because we live in the country and the nearest job would be at least a 10 mile walk.
And yet, they talk all the time about how they can’t wait until I move out and that they are sick of having my “worthless ass” around all the time, but they are the ones making it impossible for me to leave.
None of my family members can afford to take me in while I search for a job either, and that was my only other idea.
So I have two questions really: 1.) Why would they intentionally put me in a situation like this? 2.) What can I even do about it?