My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. I love him very much, but lately I’ve been feeling a bit of a disconnection between us. It has been going on for three weeks now, and I’m getting really scared that he is done with me. I asked him if he still loves me and he said yes, but that is the only time he has said it lately, and he used to spontaneously tell me all the time. It is my first relationship, so I thought that maybe that’s just how things goes in relationships. You always hear that when the infatuation part is over, the passion sort of dies.
Then I started to notice certain changes. He doesn’t write hearts in his texts anymore. Just three weeks ago he always did that. That was our way of sending love in a plain everyday text. Then he sort-of stopped responding to my texts and only replying if it was something practical like time and dates. And he stopped writing goodnight. I would write both on texts and Snapchat, where I could see that he saw it.
All of these things are small, I mean he could just be busy at work, plus he has started to work out a lot lately, so maybe he was just tired. But the thing is, I know that he has met some new friends, both female. And he writes to one of them all the time now. I notice it when we are together that he’s always sitting with his phone and he is kind of turning it away from me when I look. I got really scared because he hadn’t talked about her, so I had to find out about her on my own. I started asking some questions about who she is and all that, and he just said that it was someone he’s just talking to. I got really scared because how can he have time to write her so much, but not me?
Well things progressed and I kept my feelings to myself for about a week before I broke down. I asked him about this girl and asked him about the lack of communication he has had towards me. And why his behavior suddenly changed when he met her.
He told me that there is nothing going on between them, that he just needs to talk to other people to gain more friends. I expressed that that was okay, but why was I put aside along the way?
He couldn’t give me an answer to that.
Now I’m just scared that he is getting over me before breaking up with me. He did the same thing to his last girlfriend. He starting writing other girls when still seeing her. Back then I didn’t know, but have throughout the year found out from things he and his family have said.
We have planned a trip to London in a few weeks, and I’m just afraid that he’s still only with me because of that, and will break up with me when we get home.
I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to talk to him about it again. I’m afraid I might be right and he’ll tell me I’m not, but then prove me right.
I know this is a long rant, but I’m so insecure about this and it is eating me up.